Pure; omegaverse

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN: JIN

  I reflect back on our shower conversation while Tae urges me into the bedroom and closes the door. Am I too close to the alpha? I really like him and spending time with him. He's so kind to me and respectful. He never makes me feel uncomfortable or tries to move past my boundaries...
I think about my feelings for JB. Do I even still have those same feelings? Thinking back now I think it was just childish infatuation and familiarity. I clung to him because of my fear of the unknown maybe?
Jimin is worried about me while Yoongi just seems distracted with his own issues that he won't talk about.
"You okay, Jinnie?" Tae's soft whispered voice comes from behind me. I look at the bed, blushing.
"Y-Yes. I'm fine."
He nods, walking deeper into the room and pulling back the bedsheets. "I'm sure you're exhausted. You should sleep." He smiles.
Feeling a weird sensation in my stomach among the butterflies, I sit down on the thick mattress and pull my knees up to my chest, my shirt sleeve slipping over my shoulder as it swarms me.
His hand pulls it back up and he kisses my head. "You should bundle up tonight. That storm is only going to get worse. If the fire goes out I don't want you getting sick."
I frown as he covers me up and moves over to the floor, laying out a second blanket. I sit up. "W-What are you doing?"
"Going to sleep?"
I huff. "Come up here. The bed is big enough and we can stay warmer." I squeak as the lights suddenly cut off, the wind raging outside. "P-please! I'm scared of the dark!" I cry.
He immediately gets up on the bed and pulls me into his arms and I bury my face in his chest. Our hearts beating very fast in the dark.
"C-can you distract me until I fall asleep?" I whisper nervously.
His hand begins palming my hair. "Mhm, okay. So...what is your favorite thing about the sanctuary?"
      I glance up at him in surprise. "Honestly? The f-food."   
     He snorts. "The food?"
      Flushing self consciously, I nod. "I love food. I k-know I have to watch my weight and stuff but I just love enjoying food. It was healthy but they made it so good. I could never get enough. They would only let us eat in small intervals, though." I pout.
      He squeezes me tighter. "I'm sorry. If we were under different circumstances and you were mine..." he pauses as my breath hitches. "I'd make sure you could eat all you wanted all the time. You'd never go hungry."
      A feel tears fill my eyes. Why? Why did I have to meet this alpha? Why now when it's impossible? I have to go back and we definitely won't be mated by the society. My mate has already been chosen for me...
      Probably a stern alpha that would follow the societies expectations for me and control every aspect of my life and body from my food intake to the number of pups I'm expected to have. I would have no say in any of it. The thought of such a future looming over me is depressing. Suffocating me.
"Tae?"
"Yeah?"
"W-What if I don't want to go back? W-what if...I just stayed with you?" I whisper, scared of his rejection.
He's quiet a long time. "Jin...that's..."
"I know. I know it's stupid but...maybe I don't want to be forced off to a strange alpha that will just treat me like a toy doll. My only use being to provide him with pups and to look pretty." My tears spill over. "Please don't say it..."
He sighs. "Omega...I would love it if you'd stayed with me but you have to understand that I can't promise you safety out here. Every day we face the prospect of death. Starvation and attacks by other alphas or betas. It's no place for an omega." He admits.
I grasp his shirt in my hands, a sudden feeling of desperation coming over me. I tilt my head up and lean forward, pressing my lips firmly against his surprised mouth.
      For several long moments neither of us move, just frozen with our lips pressed together—then his firm but gentle hands push me away.
      "Jin, no, baby. We can't do this. It's not right. You have to go back, baby." He pleas.
      It falls on deaf ears, ignoring his concerned ramblings, I boldly reach up and kiss him again. I don't know why I do it. It's like something inside urges me to do it. My heart races with excitement and relief as his lips slowly start to move against mine.
      "Baby..." He groans, rolling until he's pressing me down into the bed with his strong body. It's like something snaps inside him and he growls, forcing my lips open with his wet tongue, his hands grasping my wrists and pinning them above my head.
     Gasping, I try to move my lips and tongue in rhythm with his but I have no experience in this. "T-Tae..." whimpering, my thighs instinctively wrapping around his hips as his lips trail away from my wet mouth to my neck, sucking on my damp skin. The feeling in my stomach strengthens, my thighs clenching together.
      "You smell and taste so good, Jinnie. P-please don't do this, please don't make me lose my control." He pleads, his deep groans reverberating against my skin.
       "P-please. Please don't take me back. I d-don't care how harsh it is here. I want you to be my alpha." I beg, not caring how needy I sound. I can't help it. It just feels right with him. His hands on my body, his lips on mine...
     I know that this is so wrong and goes against everything I've been raised to believe and do but I don't care. I don't feel scared with him. He makes me feel safe no matter what he says.
       He pulls back a little to look into my eyes, the same hunger and desperation reflected in his gaze as mine. I know he feels it too. I may be innocent and pure but I know this is right, this is supposed to be. I know it deep down. Why fight it?
       He shakes his head with a heavy sigh. "I can't do this to you, baby. I can't taint such perfection. You deserve a nice, simple, and safe life. I can't give you that."   
       I cling to him. "I don't need any of that. I just want to stay with you."
      "And what about Jimin and Yoongi? Are you just going to forget all about them and make them go back without you?"
       I bite my lip, frowning. "After our matings we wouldn't be able to see each other again anyway." I admit sadly.
       He groans and sits up, dropping his face in his hands. Feeling cold and alone, I scoot up behind me and wrap my arms and legs around him, resting my head on his back. Breathing him in.
      "Please, Taehyung. I k-know you feel it, too. I know you want me. Are you really going to make me go b-back?" I ask, my voice breaking with tears and fear.
       He stays silent.