Colton & His Angel (Book One Of The "And His" Series) (Un-Edited) (COMPLETED)

Chapter Thirty Nine- Colton (Unedited)

Today is the day I say goodbye to my mom—my birth mom that is. Goodbye, seems funny saying goodbye to a person who didn't give two fucks about me. I finish doing my tie as my angel comes out in a simple black dress, even dressed in black she still looks like an angel to me. "Hey," she says softly.
"Are you okay?" She asks as she wraps her arms around my waist from behind.

"I am now," I say with a small smile and turn in her arms kissing her forehead. 

"I'll be right by your side, every step of the way," she tells me.

"I know," I say softly.

"It's time" I hear saint shout.

"Okay, we'll be right there" I shout back.

"Colton" my angel whispers to me. "Look at me," she tells me.

I look to her instantly, and she kisses me softly before hugging me tightly. "I love you, so so, much," she says softly.

"I know, I love you too angel mine" I smile kissing her softly before I take her hand in mine and leave my bedroom.

We get into saints car and drive towards the crematorium where my birth mom lies. Layla reaches for my hand entwining her fingers with mine. "It's gonna be okay," she says softly.

I smile sadly at my girl giving her a reassuring nod. "I know"

We reach the crematorium and the priest is standing outside waiting. "Is this all for her?" He asks us.

Fucking should be glad she's got me here at all...

Layla's hand tightens in mine as the priest looks at me.

Shit, I must have said that out loud...

"Yes, father—it's just us," Saint tells him.

He nods. "Would you like to say your goodbyes before we begin?" The priest asks me as we walk inside. There at the altar is my mother, she's inside a pine box with a simple floral garland on the top.

Do I? What would I say to a dead person? It's not like she can say she's sorry for how she treated me, who my fucking dad is...

"You just say your piece son, talk to her, speak your mind—get it off your chest, all of it," Saint tells me.

"I could come with you if you like" my angel whispers to me.

"No, it's okay," I tell her. "I need to do this on my own"

She smiles sadly, nodding at me before giving me a chaste kiss on the lips. Momma and Saint hug me before leaving me with the woman who gave birth to me, treated me like an animal for years, and then gave me away.

I sit next to her coffin and sigh heavily. "Hey," I say to the coffin.

I don't know what I'm waiting for, it's not like she can reply or anything. "So—an overdose huh?" I scoff humourlessly. "You always did love your drugs didn't you eh, mother?"

Silence...

"Better then me, better than yourself—obviously," I say bitterly. "I don't get it, why didn't you love me? Why didn't you want me? Did I repulse you? Do I look like my dad is that it?" I growl angrily. "I mean it's not like I can ask you who my dad is now anyway can I?"

Silence...

"You know, I went through hell when you gave me up... I was beaten, starved, fuck—even sexually assaulted in those care homes" I laugh humourlessly. "All because you didn't love me—didn't want me, all you ever wanted was your drugs, and your booze, and your cigarettes—did you give a shit about me? No, you didn't, I don't get how I was even brought into this world in the first place"