always and forever - billie eilish

lowkey, coming up with a title is difficult.

title: it's not a song, just me speaking my mind

billie's POV

---------------------------------

it's crazy, things keep getting more and more familiar. but it's only little things. like i remember going to an award show or i'll remember calling elle "ellie bean" or something like that. i haven't remembered elle or claudia yet, but i think i'm getting there. 

i've been out of the hospital for about two weeks now and i'm figuring out how to work the wheelchair and how to do shit by myself.  i finally got my wrist brace and sling off so i'm happy about that. everything is actually going pretty good. and of course i've learned what turns elle on, that's important. i love teasing her. i think that in the soon future, i'll be ready to take the relationship further. i know she's been wanting to for god knows how long. i just wasn't fully ready. but i'm getting there. little by little. 

"so billie, you remember pepper right? your dog?" elle asks. "duh" i laugh a little. "great, well your mum invited us over tonight so we're going to take bear and blu so they can play with her. how does that sound?" she asks. "that sounds good" i agree. 

about two hours go by and we're in the car driving to my parents house. once we get there we all say hello and go to the backyard as mom brings out food. i watch blu and bear carefully, making sure neither of them get hurt because i know that if either of them tested pepper she could bite their adorable faces off like that. 

"so, how's everything going?" dad asks. "it's actually been really good. i'm starting to remember little things. i haven't remembered everything but i think i'm getting there." i answer as i take a bite of my food. "elle, what about you? how's online schooling?" mom asks. "it's great to be honest. it's not nearly as stressful and it's the same classes i take at UCLA" she answers with a smile. 

we continue talking for a few more hours and it starts to get dark. "we better get going, but i love you" i announce. "love you guys" dad smiles and hugs us both. we all say goodbye and get back in the car. 

once we get home elle puts the puppies in the guest bedroom and helps me into bed. she lays down beside me and turns on the office before wrapping her arm and leg around me. she kisses my cheek and i smile down at her. i lean down and kiss her lips. it slowly escalates and i break it off. "i'm getting there" i assure her. "i'm in no rush." she responds and pecks our lips together once again.

i love her so much.