A Flower's Affection (KiriBaku Flower Shop AU)

Ground Zero-Runaway Bus

Long, long ago (not that long ago, despite the fact that it took me three weeks to write this enormous chapter)
In a story far, far away (it's still this one)
        I bring you Bakugo's gay panic from two chapters ago. Buckle up boys, girls, and non-binary friends, this is a really long chapter. (I am not copying Thomas Sanders--Fight me)
        ⚠️Which also means that with Baku on patrol, lots of violence and some maiming.⚠️

        Ground Zero, surprise surprise, was in his usual pissy mood during his Sunday afternoon patrol.

        "Remind me why the fuck I have to patrol with you again?" Sparks popped across the explosion hero's gloved knuckles, betraying his restlessness from the shared perch on the upper levels of a luxury apartment building. Ground Zero resisted the tempting urge to shove the annoying twat of a hero next to him off the roof. Lunch swirled in his gut, filling him with energy that he couldn't wait to expel in some shitty extra's face.

        "Because," Shitty Shoto replied calmly, "the police think something might happen today and want me to have a partner watching for collateral, and I need someone to take over my patrol when I go back to the dorms in an hour."

        "I ain't your fucking partner," Ground Zero growled in warning. He always hated when Icy-Hot reminded him that, like Pinky, the dual-toned brat knew his alterego. Zero had originally blamed Deku for that, until he realized that Half-n-Half was exceedingly talented at connecting dots that had abso-fucking-lutely nothing to do with each other.

        "Of course not," Shoto agreed monotonously. "I merely asked if you would like to 'bust-ass' in the area west of the school, and you agreed."

        "I did fucking not," the irritable hero snapped, glaring through his mask. "I went on shitty patrol, and you fucking followed me."

        A cute florist working in the area had nothing to do with his eagerness to accept the patrol. Not one fucking bit. Not even if Ground Zero had considered stopping by in costume to see the furious blush across the redhead's face--which he hadn't. No, he definitely hadn't pictured how fun that might be.

        Shoto, a hand pressed disinterestedly against his earwig, wasn't listening anyways, and he never would. He had his theories, and no one could dissuade him from them. "There is a speeding bus on twenty-second," he reported to Zero, knowing the other hero wouldn't have his radio in. "The driver seems upset, and he may wander into our area. The police haven't been able to slow him down."

        "Why the fuck can't people drive un this shitty city?" The blonde hero sighed. "You know how many shitty failed brakes, tire fuck-ups, and road-rage assholes I've had this month?"

        "Deku has a theory," Shoto offered. "Have you heard the reports on the vigilante on the north side?"

        Ground Zero snorted. A vigilante was an unknown hero, one who hadn't proven himself yet in the field. They were typically younger, and the media rarely named them. A dozen or so new vigilantes popped up every month, but only a few ever got themselves recognized. "The one who fucking soaked himself trying to stop a mugger when a water line exploded?"

        Vigilantes also made a lot of mistakes, and were often ridiculed for rescues gone wrong. Grape Juice had actually been named for how many mistakes he made--how many times he got squashed. Ground Zero had been named when he and the police had both tried to raid a drug ring in the warehouse district, a chaos that turned the storages into nothing but charred rubble. Chargebolt had taken out the power for an entire city block. Deku...

        Deku's hero name needed no fucking explanation, useless fuck that he was.

        There were exceptions. Shoto and Creati of course were perfect stuck- up pricks that had made flashy, flawless debuts. Ingenium had nearly murdered a serial killer, making him the poster child of tough justice. Red Riot had seemed to pop up out of nowhere, and the media had no idea how long he actually been active before they caught wind of his quiet heroism--and the idiot witness who had finally come up with a name for him had been so fucking high that he'd described Riot as a woman. A shirtless woman.