Okay I know I missed Misha's birthday!- but!- to make up for it I took a bund of tumblr 'incorrect supernatural quotes' and extended them a little with my own add ins so this is basically just short crack fics
Hope you enjoy!
~
Cas was in his bedroom staring blankly at a wall when he heard a loud ass yell coming from Dean's bedroom
Immediately he shot up and ran to the room flinging open the door he found Dean in his pj's lying on the bed "Dean?"
The hunter smiled at him "Can we cuddle?"
-
Sam and were bored and drunk, Jack and Cas were out visiting the girls and so Dean had the brilliant idea to get hammered
"This is going to sound like a terrible plan but hear me out" Sam said randomly and Dean shrugged "You had me at 'this is going to be a terrible plan'"
He sipped his 100th beer "What it is?"
Sam chuckled "You should ask Cas out"
Dean looked at his brother like he had two heads, "We've been married for five years Sammy"
Sam blinked "Oh"
And then he passed out
-
"What the H-E double hokey sticks are you doing?" Dean asked as Sam frantically search around the library "I lost my favourite book!"
Dean shrugged "Can't you just watch the movie version of it?"
Sam stopped dead in his tracks and stared at Dean, "Go back to hell"
"It's just a book!"
Sam gasped "JUST A-"
~
"Dean what happened?" Cas asked later that day referring to a few small bruises on Dean, Dean sniffed "Nothing Cas"
"Nothing"
-
"Dean you need to calm down!"
Dean nodded weakly "Okay, you're right"
Cas raised his brow "That's an unusual phrase for you- did you just learn it?"
Sam laughed and high fived Cas "Nice"
"GUYS I'M STILL BLEEDING OUT!"
-
"Jack what's wrong?" Cas asked when Jack came home looking upset
"I accidentally scratched Dean's car- how long do you think I have to live?"
"Ten" Cas said
Jack frowned "Ten what?"
"Nine"
-
(This one is actually a joke from the amazing world of gumball)
The WiFi was out in the bunker and TFW 2.0 was going mad
So mad that they turned real life into the internet- well except for Sam because he has..books
Dean was playing flappy bird on his imaginary phone when Sam walked into the kitchen one morning "Seriously Dean?" He said scoffing
"Ssh- I'm almost at a hundred!"
"Cas?!- Jack?!"
Castiel and Jack just shrugged, "Unbelievable" Jack turned his head and pointed his imaginary phone at Sam's bitchface "1 like"
"Okay you know what I'm blocking you-on everything" He pulled out his phone before realising that there was still no WiFi "How do you block people in real life?"
Dean's head shot up and he whispered to Cas and Jack "I suggest we leave before he figures it out"
-
Dean scoffed "I'm not in love with Cas!- that's crazy Sam!"
"I've decided not to wear my contact lenses" Sam stood "I've seen enough bullshit already" He turned to walk out but his face met a wall "Ow fuck shit!"
-
Last one, this one is just fluffy- I saw it on tumblr a while back, so I remember how it went down but this was the gist of it
Sam was in the kitchen working on his laptop early in the morning, when Mary walked in, she seemed upset as she started to make her breakfast "Mom?- are you okay?"
Mary nodded "Yeah, I just- I know John wasn't great with you guys after I died but I still loved him and.. I was just wondering where my wedding ring was- it's stupid-"
Sam shook his head "No its not, Dean actually has your ring" He explained "It's okay to miss him mom"
Mary raised a brow "Dean has it?"
Just then Dean walked into the kitchen in nothing but hotdog pants and a robe "Mornin'" He mumbled
"Dean, Sam says you have my wedding ring" Mary told him and Dean nodded "Yeah I do- why?"
"I just wanted to see it is all"
Dean shrugged "Okay" He said and yelled out the kitchen door "Hey Cas mom wants to see your ring!"
~
Fun Fact: Misha's real name is Dmitri Tippens Krushnic
..let that sink in
