Diana(#Wattys2015)

Chapter 40

Diana’s POV

Harry ordered Chinese for us and we ate that for lunch. We’re both in bed now watching a movie. If it’s one thing I know about Harry he loves movies very much. Today’s a pretty cool day but we still decided to stay indoors.

“Hey we have to watch Love Actually sometime.” He says while pulling me closer to him.

“Love Actually?” I ask confused. I don’t think I’ve ever heard of that movie.

“Yes it’s one of my favourite movies. We have to watch it.” He winks.

“Alright.” I agree with him. I would like to watch his favourite movie with him.

“Hey you promised me you would take me to the lake out back.” I pout and turn to face him.

“Aw love don’t worry I’ll take you when it’s spring.” He smile then focuses back on the TV.

We hardly ever watch this TV in his room but since he wanted to cuddle we stayed up here instead. I love days like these when Harry and I can just relax and cuddle together. I hate days like when I have school and the only time we ever get to ourselves are only in the late afternoon after school. So right now I’m cherishing this moment with us.

Harry’s leaning back on the headboard with my head on his chest as we both focus on the movie. His hand is on my hair and his other one is around my waist. I don’t exactly know what’s going but I just wish I can stay here forever. I wish I can stay in Harry arms forever. I feel so safe and happy in his arms.

***

“Where are we going?” I ask as Harry places his hand over my thigh.

“It’s a surprise.” He winks then continues down the road.

I’m wearing the mini dress and matching heels he got me for Christmas because he said that he wants to take me out someplace special. I really don’t know where we’re going but I’m just not in the mood for anything right now. I don’t know why but these few days I’ve been feeling pretty moody.

I let out a sigh and continue to stare out the window as he drives to our destination. Tomorrow’s Monday and I’m so not up for school. Well at least I completed all my homework already so I don’t have to worry about that anymore. I let my mind wonder for a bit and I soon I find myself thinking of Jack all of a sudden. I don’t know why but I feel sorta strange thinking of him. Then my mind goes back on that dream I had about him.

I haven’t had a nightmare in a long time and now to have one like that is really scary to me. I don’t know what to make of it. My mind has this weird way of thinking like when I start to think of one bad thing all the others follow after because right now I’m still trying to wonder if anything happened between Harry and Wilma.

But I’m only human

And I bleed when I fall down

I’m only human

And I crash and I break down

The song ‘human’ is what is playing through Harry’s radio and I can relate to these lyrics. It’s true I am in fact only human. I may have a lot on my mind but if I think too much about it I’ll just be worrying and that would be no good to me. Worries don’t help anything but sometimes we can’t help but still do it at some point in our lives.

***

Harry’s POV

I brought Diana out to eat at a fancy restaurant not only because I wanted to but I was hoping it would clear her mind a bit and cheer her up. I really don’t like seeing her quiet and all to herself. I mean I don’t mind but I would like my girlfriend back. But I really can’t blame her because of all she’s been through. But I do want her to at least smile and be happy when she’s around me as she used to before. I guess since Friday when she saw Wilma here she thought something happened between us but I don’t even know if anything did.

Well I ordered the delicious food for us and I try my best to get Diana to talk a little. We talk until our food arrives and then we dig in when it does. The food smells so delicious and it tastes even more delicious. I really love taking my girlfriend out and when I do it not only makes me happy but it also makes her happy too.

After eating I took her out for a walk around the park and then we watched the sunset. I even stole a kiss from her when she was least expecting it. We had fun and finally she was being all cheerful again but still she seemed a little distant. All I really want is her happiness.

We are now back home and it’s pretty late. I didn’t realise we spent so much time out. I was just busy driving around town, talking and crazily singing along to tunes in the car. Although it wasn’t the way I expected it to be today actually turned out fine.

***

Diana’s POV

“Well I’m going to bed now goodnight.” I dismiss myself by placing a quick kiss on Harry’s lips.

“Alright, love goodnight.” He replies.

“Hey uh I hope you don’t mind but I think I’ll sleep in my room tonight.” I suggest.

Harry looks a little surprised at first but then he just nods and smiles at me. I turn around and walk up to my room. When I step inside the room I realise that I haven’t been here in a very long time. I change into my pyjamas and then plop down on the mattress and sink myself in. I pull up the covers and sink in further and then I start to cry.

I just cry out everything that I have been keeping in for the past few days. Everything that has been bothering me I let it all out. I cry and cry until I feel the like the tears are unstoppable. I can’t help it although I try my very for my sobs to be silent they are still loud enough to be heard around the room and maybe outside too. I just have to wish, hope and pray that Harry doesn’t pass by my room tonight because I don’t want him to see me this way. I love him and I can’t let him see me hurting this way.

After about half an hour straight of crying I feel like it’s impossible to cry anymore but the tears just won’t stop. I feel my eyes closing down on me and my body going numb. I bury my face in my pillow and just let the rest of the tears fall and tumble down on the pillow. I feel like my head’s about to burst any minute because of all that crying. No my head feels like it will explode any second now. I look at my wrists and rub a finger over the scars. I don’t usually cut myself and I hate myself for doing it once but that was all Jack’s fault. I have a strong urge right now to harm myself again but then I think of Harry and my mind changes immediately. Then my eyes fail on me and I feel my body drifting off into sleep.

Guys have you ever cried that much that your head feels like it’s about to burst? That’s how Diana felt in the ending of this chapter. I hope you guys liked it tho. Feel free to tell me if you think it sucks.

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