The Slytherin Princess

Chapter 20

Love

DRACO'S POV

I have never been more ashamed. Jayne pushed and pushed and I broke down in front of her. I hated her for making me weak. And I hated myself for allowing it. But as much as I hated how I felt for being vulnerable in front of her, it also felt right. Like she was the one person I could trust. As I cried in her arms, I felt something I never have felt before and it was terrifying. It was love.

JAYNE'S POV

I felt Draco stir in my arms and I snapped back to reality. I had zoned out but I couldn't sleep. It was dark out and when I looked at the clock it was already 6pm. The entire day had passed. Draco sat up and his eyes were red. It was obvious we both didn't know what to say. He looked around the room surveying the destruction he had caused. "It's ok," I said softly. He looked at his hands. They were black and blue and swollen with dried blood on them. "Come on, we should get those cleaned up" I said softly. We both stood up. "I don't need your help" he said and walked to the bathroom. This idiot. He let me in and it scared him so now he was trying to push me away. I knew what he was doing because I did the same thing. I followed him into the bathroom. "Draco, I know what you are doing," I said. He started trying to scrub the blood of his hands and his eyes watered. "You let me in and now you want to push me away so you can't get hurt" I said. "Just go Jayne," he said. "No," I said. He scrubbed harder and stared at the sink. I watched the water mix with the blood from his hands. "Get the fuck out" he yelled and grabbed my wrists pining me up against the door. Our faces were inches apart and I stared into his eyes. "I trusted you with my pain, and you trusted me with yours. I won't leave you Draco because-" I stammered. "Why? Why do you even care?" he spat. "Because I love you" I yelled. We both froze. He let and stepped back not once breaking eye contact. "Jayne, you need to leave now," he said slowly. His voice was so calm it scared me more than when he was angry. But I did. Despite every part of me wanting to stay, I left. I ran straight to my room and collapsed on my bed. I laid there waiting for the tears but I never cried. I just laid there absolutely silent wondering how I fell so hard and so fast. I should have known even after i learned about Draco's past that even if he ever did love someone it wouldn't be me. My own dad doesn't love me. I can be friends with Harry and "forgive" him all I want but it doesn't change anything. My father chose Harry over me. He didn't love me, why would Draco. That was the last thought I had before I fell asleep. Sometimes I wish I would fall asleep and never wake up.

The next day I woke up and debated going to class but ultimately decided to go. I had to. I can't fail at school too. I got dressed and put my hair in a ponytail. I did minimal makeup, just enough to make me look like a person. I went to breakfast with Cami and Kenz and faked a smile. Then we went to Potions. We got there early so I sat down at my desk alone. I waited and waited and I thought Draco wasn't coming because class had just about started but he showed up right before. He sat down and didn't even look at me. I however did look at him but I wished I didn't. He looked awful. His eyes were red, he had bags under his eyes and his cheeks were hollow. The entire class we didn't say one word to each other. I caught him looking at me a couple times and everytime I looked in his eyes, my heart broke. He looked empty. Potions ended and I went to DADA. We were starting to learn the basics of the Boggart and how to banish it. Today we were just getting a lecture on it. But on Friday, we were all going to face Boggart and banish it ourselves. I wasn't particularly nervous because I was a great student in DADA. I knew the boggart would probably show me a rabid dog because I got bit by one when I was little and that was scary. But I knew it wasn't real and I knew the spell to banish it so I would be fine. After DADA, I went to dinner and then straight to my room. I was exhausted and I missed Draco.

Every single day was pretty much the same. I slept terribly, got ready and went to breakfast and barely ate. Then I went to Potions where Draco and I ignored each other aside from the constant looking at one another. We were both looking progressively worse as the days went by. I just wanted to talk to him. I even tried one day but he just left. Then I go to DADA where we prepare for Boggart. Then I go to the library and then I go to dinner where I barely eat again. And now every night, I go to the astronomy tower and I sit there and think about everything, mostly Draco. Every single night I have to stop myself from going to his room. I wish I never told him I loved him. I knew how it would affect him. It would scare him and he would push me away and I was right. Now I might have just lost him forever.