Thinner

18

Chest.
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It was so unusual for him to suddenly be this calm. He remembered there was a saying, 'the calm before the storm'..but it felt more like 'the calm after the storm'.

His mind has been traveling at the speed of lightning for the past two hours. He hasn't heard from any nurses or doctors about Hyunjin's wellbeing. He was only sitting up against a firm yet pillow like chest, in which belonged to Chan. He was feeling puzzled but calm, and the most surprising fact about everything; was Chan feed him strawberries dipped in chocolate protein pudding, watching a TV show to bring back up the mood.

And genuinely speaking..he couldn't even think about his weight, nor the numbers..he was so fucsed on the small rubs on his tummy from Chan's resting hands, and the shoe playing on the TV.

Of course he wasn't enjoying, what he would consider a big meal. He didn't pay attention to it at all, his focus was rather on a whole different planet.

It felt like the first experience of happiness ever. And it wasn't really what he had imagined..he wasn't at a playground or an amusement park. He was in a hospital, smiling and feeling decently content while eating a bunch of strawberries.

And he didn't care.

But he most likely will in the future.

"I watched this a lot as a kid, listening to the theme song, especially when I was trying to hide my iPod from my teachers in primary school" Chan laughed, setting down the bowl of strawberries as he pulling the boy closer.

"I've always wanted that as a kid, but I never really got anything I wanted" he frowned at the thought of his own childhood. "I'm sorry I'm making everything negative again".

"It's alright. Your feelings are as valid as mine are. I enjoy listening to different experiences, even if they aren't exactly...happy ones" Chan comforted, rubbing the boy's back.

"Do you always have to be so comforting? I feel kind I'm just hugging a giant teddy bear right now" he complained, but wholeheartedly he enjoyed the comfort.

The way Chan's hands were so comforting, resting on his smaller proportions and not even doing much. It felt so calming and comforting in a way he couldn't describe. As if he didn't want to leave the latter's presence, scared that his emotions would take over again.

"Even if we haven't known each other for a year, you can always come to me yeah? I'm not going to hurt you angel" he smiled, brushing away strokes of hair from the younger's hair.

It would be a lie if he said he didn't feel butterflies resting against Chan's chest. This man was a gift from God. And even himself couldn't deny it.

Was it too early to trip over a branch and fall for the older? Was it wrong for wanting to never let go of him, holding him tight? Is this what love felt like?

"Don't make me cry again" he smiled, falling into the man's chest, hugging him as tightly as possible.

Chan laughed as he cuddled the boy impossibly closer, not caring about the harsh and sticking bones poking him from the younger. He just wanted the boy closer, and so did Jeongin. Even if it hurt, none of them commented.

It was the first time for Jeongin to feel something as genuine as a big, warm hug. It felt like he thought that a lot. But the way Chan and Hyunjin showed him the diversity this world had, made him feel more confident within himself, it made him feel a genuine form of love and care that he has never experienced before.

And maybe it was enough to make him a hopeless romantic.

"And here I thought I was the one getting swarmed by hugs" the familiar voice penetraded both of the boys ears. Quickly glancing up to see Hyunjin approach with a small, yet fragile smile on his lips as he carefully made his way inside.

"Jesus- when did you wake up from sugery" Chan almost cursed. Looking at the taller sit down carefully.

"Two hours or so ago..they said that it went well, and that I just needed a bit time to get around..they don't know I'm here, so when they find out, I'm fucked" he laughed gently.

Jeongin practically flung into Hyunjin's arms, forgetting completely about his current condition. Words couldn't describe how much he missed the taller. He forgot about his consistent thought of no wanting to leave Chan's embrace, instead allowing himself to melt into Hyunjin's.

"I swear you need to take it easy Hyun" Chan lectured.

"Blah blah, I know. But couldn't resist it. I had to opportunity to get away, and I took it. They most likely know where I am, since I don't really get to run far" he laughed, looking down at the clinging boy, who wasn't ready to let go in any form of outcome. "One reason being that I won't have the stamina..the second being Jeongin" he smiled, ruffling the boy's hair softly.

"He was worried about you all day. He is happy to see you".

"It's alright, I was scared the first time I needed surgery..and in still here! I'm not going anywhere" he smiled, readjusting his position with the younger.

If relief could be described one way. It  shouldn't be described as weight lifted off your shoulders..it felt more like weight being lifted from your heart, relieving the stress from your stomach and your head felt like you could finally relax properly.

"I ate today" he mumbled, not knowing why he felt the need to mention such an accomplishment, that he would most likely hate in the future.

But seeing Hyunjin conquering such a surgery with ease and still being able to smile brightly, made himself want to be proud of his own accomplishment.

"Now that! Is fucking amazing. I'm  proud of you".

The way Hyunjin's face lit up at the mention, it made him feel like he truly cared about his accomplishment, It made sense to him that maybe, just maybe, if he tried to ko think too much about it..it would all settle down eventually.