Thinner

108

Ceasing.
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He let out a groan as he placed down the fifth box inside the empty room. His palms aching, his back sore, his thighs slightly shaking, but neither of that could really prevent him from getting everything done. A smile still shined on his face, something hid past self couldn't ever carry under this amount of pressure. Yet still, he found himself flowing up and down the stairs, caring boxes to every empty room he came across without a single complaint. He could see Chan outside the window, carrying the furniture with Hyunjin, who seemed to slack more off than cooperating with the eldest.

It made him grin even wider.

They've recently moved to a different city, after a constant amount of hard work being paid off, so that all of them could get away from the big city and all the noise it carried with it. Settling down into a calmer town, with fewer people populating around the area and more wilderness surrounding them.

It was a perfect place, pretty much the dream place they all have been wishing for.

They were living the life they were striving for, and it only made everything more genuine to smile about. A whole different chapter opening, where love and peace could be perfectly received and given without disturbance. Where one's heart and mindset weren't judged by people passing by on the go. It was all becoming calming, changing the way it needed to change.

A lot of things changed.

He was 23, with a job in his hands, two lovers to feel complete, and lessons in life he wouldn't ever forget. He wasn't linked to Anorexia Nervosa anymore. He actually never thought about it. He was a healthy weight, enjoyed to occasionally work out with Chan when he felt like it, he loved eating out places with Hyunjin, no longer afraid about the way someone cooked his food. He was free from all those worries. The weights have lifted off of his shoulders. The trauma that had weighted down his heart has only turned into blossoming lessons that he carried so much appreciation for.

He felt loved by Chan and Hyunjin. He felt loved by himself. And he still felt loved by Hajun.

He still carried him around with him to this day. A necklace around his neck with a picture of him in it, smiling, while being happy. Photos around the house of him, all to remember his existence that once blessed them so beautifully yet also painfully. Some may say it would be too far, but he couldn't help the love he carried for Hajun, knowing that the alter he crafted for him was the first thing to be successfully placed in their new forever home.

He wanted to make sure that the love Hajun grew up without didn't follow him to the afterlife. He made sure that he included him in everything important, as if he was still alive, beside him.

So he could only smile when he held one of the many pictures they had of Hajun in his hands, tracing the face behind the glass, his heart warming as he could stare into those eyes he still missed so greatly. Accepting the loss was a difficult journey for him, but each day had made it better, easier, more durable. And now, years later, he felt nothing but gratitude to whatever Hajun had brought to his and theirs lives.

He placed down that frame, picking up a second box that held other decorative items inside of it. From pictures, candles, quotes, books, and whatever stuff they managed to bring from their old place.

"How does pizza sound for dinner?" Chan spoke as he peeked his head through the doorway, a smaller cardboard box in his hands, which he sat down beside the younger who turned his full attention to the older.

"Sure, I'll take whatever you get. Where is Hyunjin?".

"Somewhere complaining over the next weeks weather, you know typical Hyunjin stuff" Chan chuckled, leaving a quick peck on Jeongin's cheek before he spoke again. "Speaking of Hyunjin, could you help him in the bathroom while I set up the TV?".

Jeongin nodded, not at all hesitating to help out his loved ones. So he walked past Chan, entering the hallway before he made his way to the bathroom downstairs.

The house wasn't that big, but it really wasn't small either. They had space for a whole dining room, a kitchen, 2 bathrooms including showers, a living room, an office, 2 bedrooms, and a basement. It was two stories with great access to the nearby forest.

It was a perfect place for the three of them to settle down.

He held the necklace around his neck as he made it downstairs, smiling as the brief memories of Hajun made their appearances, their laughter filling his head. The only thing that saddened him about the death till this day was how, by each day, he slowly forgot Hajun's voice and the sound of his laughter. Occasionally finding himself digging for videos to remember it, but not as often as he used to.

"Why couldn't Chan do this?" he heard the small mumbling coming from beneath him, looking down to see the taller crouched down with a bucket of soapy water and a cloth, scrubbing the floor with his own hands.

"Would you rather fix the TV and fumble with all that electronic?" He asked, crouching down beside the taller who looked back at him with a smile, shaking his head.

"Perhaps this might be a tiny bit better than that" he laughed. Halting his movements to throw the younger a dry cloth. "And now I have an assistant, so it's not so bad".

The smile spread further on the younger's face, wetting the cloth in his hands as he helped Hyunjin wash down the bathroom floors. Knowing he might be left alone to scrub the toilets.

Yet he didn't complain because he knew that this was everything he could possibly dream of. And he has gone through hell, obstacles that he thought would be the end of his life, and loss that mentally tore him apart and put him back together stronger than before. He had worked for it, he knew that. And he has reached the point where piece, following suit, would reach him.

He concluded through all his trials and errors, the lessons he learned from failures. That even when one expects the worst of all outcomes, a greener, more blooming plane laid on the other side of the climb. He learned that courage and acceptance led to his victory. Love and care are becoming the price he never thought to receive.

He learned how to love other people, not just himself. Even after growing up the way he did. He learned how to accept his failures, even despite it being his biggest fear. He learned how to feel on a whole different level than ever before.

All of that made him the one he was today.

Even in the future, he would keep finding new lessons, new trials, and new challenges. But he knew that no matter what. He wasn't alone. He had Chan's motivational energy to push him to pursue his goals. Hyunjin affirming words to help him cope with troubles bothering him. Hajun still held near his heart to listen to him even if he wasn't speaking, knowing that Hajun always spoke the truth, knowing that he could still feel him within himself.

He had the three most wonderful people in his hands and heart, and he needed nothing more to fulfill his life and his happiness.

And he could finally look back at everything and believe once and for all that.

He made it.
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The End.
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Thanks for reading and tuning in for Thinner, I genuinely hope you guys enjoyed reading this book! This is probably the longest it has taken me to write a book, and that is simply because I'm more busy now♡.

Love you all, and take care, eat well, and sleep well!

-flowerlino
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