Redamancy.
______________________"It's 4 in the morning. Why are you awake?" Chan mumbled as he stumbled into the kitchen, spotting the younger who sat with a cup of tea in his hands, a blanket over his body as the only light that lit up in his surroundings were the tablet that played a video.
It was dark outside, quiet in the apartment. But the streets were still occupied by some people. Either people that woke up to go to work, or people going home from bars. The slightly dripping rain explained the season they were slowly entering, the dropping temperatures reminding everyone that the end of the year was rolling around.
There was so much not many people opened their eyes to. A world that was constantly rotating even in one's sleep. But in his case, he simply couldn't sleep.
Not because he thought of someone, not because he felt upset by something. But something about tonight was just more different than any other nights. It was sleepless. He still felt fresh, and the sudden switch in his sleep schedule provoked his tired body even more. But even with a million people awake around the world, even with a million people asleep around the world, he still stood in at the border. He wasn't exactly tired, but he wasn't fully fresh either.
It's been a short night. Sometimes, they were longer, but tonight, it was short.
"I couldn't sleep. Did you sleep?" The younger questioned, looking at the male with curiosity.
Chan had either two sides to him. Late sleeper, early riser. Or no sleeper at all. Sometimes, that confused the youngest amongst them, worried about the wellbeing of his loved one, even if he knew that they had most of it under control.
"A bit, yeah. But Jeongin, baby, you need to rest" Chan explained as he wrapped his arms around the boy, who still sat engulfed in a warm blanket, yet managed to feel even more warm and comfort from the sudden embrace he was brought into.
"I know, but sleep doesn't want me the same way I want it," he muttered, feeling disappointed in his petty sleep schedule.
There was so much he needed to get done throughout the day. A tired mind and body isn't what he would be needing while doing laundry and deep cleaning the apartment. But judging by the lack of rest he managed to consume, he simply had to embrace the fact that he would be pushing a bit harder today.
"Hm, wanna take a shower then? I'm free off of work today, so I'm more than happy to help through the day, especially if you need a nap" Chan spoke, his voice sounding more awake by each second he spoke.
A shower sounded nice. And he couldn't help but smile at the feeling of being cared so much for. It's been a long time since he really felt connected to feeling love and care. Not that he didn't feel it completely, just that he had a harder time appreciating it the same way he did now.
A lot of things have shaken up his mindset for a long time. And those things were slowly, yet still, making their way out of his body, so he managed to smile more genuinely and feel more emotionally. He was glad to be back on track, glad to feel his own self accepting everything that once came crashing down all at once.
He looked up, managing to see the slight glint of light in Chan's eyes, feeling content knowing he had such great people by his side. His body trembled with slight excitement, knowing that the bad days were over.
Well, he could only hope. Because no matter what, he couldn't control the future.
But he refused to seek too far into that.
"That sounds nice. Will you be joining?" He asked, wanting to continue feeling the presence of the older, who kept smiling down at him. He felt the pair of soft, plump lips kiss his forehead gently, with gentle caresses on the sides of his neck.
"I would love too" Chan chuckled, picking the boy up in a bridal style, swirling around, causing them both to laugh quietly.
Jeongin clung to the older as much as he physically could, feeling himself getting awakened with a high dosage of adrenaline speeding through his system. It felt like he had just woken from the best sleep ever, despite getting little to none of that said sleep.
As they made it into the bathroom, Chan put the younger down. He pulled off his own shirt after doing so before helping Jeongin off with his.
Jeongin didn't mind standing naked in front of both of them. They have seen and felt every ounce of him. He wasn't particularly worried about what they thought about his appearance. That alone brought him a great feeling of comfort and security.
Chan was the first to fully get undressed, much more quicker than the boy behind him. It didn't take long before they both stood naked in the shower together, helping wash each other's hair, giving gentle kisses and providing warm embraces that helped soothe out any form of mental stress they endured through the past few days
It was like saying, 'You've done well', which mattered a lot to all of them.
Constant affirmation, especially positive, seemed to be one of their strongest love languages. Chan loved to talk, communicate, and seek out conversation with other people. He was confident in his voice, didn't feel anxious about speaking up, or holding a linger conversation with a person he would randomly deem fit to be friend material for him. He was charismatic, so most returned the favor of wanting to befriend him. Chan was, in fact, a social butterfly.
Hyunjin was more reserved. He didn't feel complicated with communicating and lived talking to his loved ones. But unlike Chan, Hyunjin didn't feel confident in approaching new personalities or people he found interesting. Hyunjin was the type to comment on how much he liked someone's clothes or how much he wanted to talk to someone. But he never strikes a conversation because he wasn't in his line of boundaries when doing so.
He, himself? Personally, he never made new friends. The only people he has gotten to know have been Hajun, Hyunjin, and Chan. He needed someone to approach first before he felt confident approaching them.
He still remembers the first time he met Chan, who was the one to strike up the conversation with him. It alone made his stay a bit more comfortable at the hospital. Hyunjin was introduced a brief moment later into his life, and he knew that if it wasn't for Chan, Hyunjin wouldn't even be in his life. And if it wasn't for that day, he fainted, Chan wouldn't be in his life either.
It was just another realization that was made clear for him some time ago. Another lesson he learned.
He learned that even if he wasn't feeling well or if things took an extremely bad turn. Positive things came out from it.
If he didn't faint that day, or at that time, Chan wouldn't have been in his life. If Chan never became a part of life because of that, Hyunjin wouldn't be in it either. If Hajun never made him run illegal errands in favor of simple notes, he wouldn't have gotten to know him like he did. And as bad as it sounds. If Hajun didn't die, he wouldn't have learned the lesson he had learned through the past few months.
Despite the pain that still presented in his heart, he accepted the outcomes of things that had turned out to be the reality he lived today, with Chan and Hyunjin, swearing that Hajun was still present, just not physically, and he felt okay with that. He felt grateful for that and for what it took to reach this specific chapter of his life.
YOU ARE READING
Thinner
Fanfiction"It's the hunger that consumes you". "I don't feel hunger anymore". "Will we ever meet again?". "Maybe in another life".