Britain: Guys I think I accidentally made China addicted to Opium
France: Why did you make him addicted to a DRUG?!
Britain: IDK IT HAPPENS!
Imperial who hates China: Britain. You and I are friends again.
Soviet: ACCIDENTALLY?!
Third: WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY "FRIENDS AGAIN?!"
(Cool Bug Facts: The Anglo-Japanese Alliance (1902–23) was a bilateral alliance between Britain and Japan. The original alliance, signed in 1902, was limited and regional, and its purpose was to counter Russia's expansion into East Asia.)
——
Britain: Third, how can you tell if someone is a psychopath? Cause I feel like Imperial is one.
Third: Just give Imperial an ice cream cone.
Britain: Why?
Third: Just do it
France: I'm having a bad feeling about this
*later*
France giving Imperial ice cream: Third told us to give you this
Imperial: Ok?
*bites the ice cream and is completely fine*
France: WHAT THE FUCK?!
Britain: WHY TF DID YOU BITE THE ICE CREAM?!
Imperial: I'm not supposed to?
That's how I usually eat ice cream-
Britain: USUALLY?!
Soviet: The fuck is going on here?
France: IMPERIAL JUST BITES THE ICE CREAM WITH HER FRONT TEETH!
Britain: AND SHE SAYS THAT IS HOW SHE USUALLY EATS ICE CREAM
Soviet: FUCK NO, STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU CRAZY BITCH!
ROACH HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU COMPLETELY FINE WITH THIS?!
Third: IT'S CALLED BEING FRIENDS WITH A PSYCHOPATH SINCE 4TH GRADE IDIOTS
——
*a building exploded*
Britain: DAMN IT THIRD!
Third: It wasn't me this time
Britain: Force of habit.
DAMN IT IMPERIAL!
Imperial: I wasn't the one who set it this time
Britain: Force of habit again.
DAMN IT SOVIET!
Soviet: Why me?!
Britain: You almost started a nuclear world war with my step-daughter. Too many times to be exact.
Soviet: Ah that makes sense.
But it wasn't me.
Britain: Then who?!
France: Oh it's just someone that forgot to turn off their stove
Britain: Makes sense-
*another building explodes*
Imperial: Oh so it was that building that I sent pipe bombs in.
Britain: DAMN IT IMPERIAL
——
FIBTS: *blaming each other for something*
Fascists who damn knows that he's going to have to try to explain this to the officials: *Gosh...
Please shut up..
Please...*
[And kids, that is how he lost his sanity]
——
[OH NO NOT THE CURSED SOV*insert goofy country* SHIP FAN CHILDS]
*FIBT just existing*
Soviet: RUN!
(He said calmly)
France: Why?
Soviet: Apparently, children, who have the same symbol as me is combined with some random a*s country I either know or have no fucking clue about them as their flag AND THEY'RE CALLING ME "DAD"
Britain: Tf do you mean by tha-
*sees the fan child of SovBrit*
OH MY GOSH WTF IS THAT
France: *receiving brain DMG as she wonders how tf can a male give birth*
Soviet: AND THAT IS NOT EVEN THE WORSE PART
Third: What makes you say that-
*sees the fan child of the ThirdUnion*
Third:
Soviet
Do me a favor.
Shoot me in the head-
*gets shot in the head*
Imperial also sees the fan child ship of her and Soviet (yes that is a ship unfortunately): Hold on, I'm going to nuke myself real quick.
*leaves*
France: Thank goodness I don't see mine-
*sees the SovAme*
And people ship my step-daughter with you..
Wtf
*there is an explosion in the background*
Soviet: I have enough of this.
Legalize nuclear bombs
*explosion*
*SWAG MESSIAH*
——
Imperial: So is it true that the other three will get into an argument over the stupidest stuff?
France: Yeah. I mean, here's an example.
*out loud*
Which way is the proper way to make cereal: Pour milk first or pour the cereal first?
Discuss!
(Uh I pour the milk first-)
Britain, Soviet, and Third: *immediately starts arguing*
France: There's your answer.
Imperial: Also will they jump someone if they say something else?
France: Dunno. Let's see.
???: Have you guys try cereal without milk?
Britain:
Third:
Soviet:
???: I actually prefer to eat my cereal dry-
*gets jumped by the three of them*
THEY JUMPING ME
THEY'RE JUMPING ME
France: Oh wow so that is also true.
Imperial: They had to be more of a psychopath than me to eat cereal dry.
*chainsaw/flamethrower/stabbing noises*
France: Ok how should we explain to UN that someone got brutally killed by them?
Imperial: Bury the remains and say nothing
If anyone asked if we were involved, deny it.
France: Good idea.
...
Personwhocommittedwarcrimes say what?
Imperial: What?
France: Finally you admitted your actions
Imperial: How-
*realization*
DAMN IT FRANCE
YOU ARE READING
Country Shenanigans
FanfictionNOTE: This book was made two years ago or in 2023! So some old HCs and cringe will be in here that are not present today! Also WTF was my humor back then 😭😭🙏🙏🙏 Countries doing random stuff for our entertainment (100% not holding them hostage) H...
