Someone call the cops on TAGE.
They gave Britain, Third and Soviet crack/j
——
Kid!Soviet: Can I have a sibling?
TAGE:
We'll just have to wait for the stork to give us your sibling
Mary knowing damn well what is going to happen: I'm in danger
*Many years later*
Soviet:
Yeah it wasn't a stork and I regret having siblings.
—
TAGE: I let my kids play UNO for three minutes and my house is on fire
#Havingkidsisamistske
—
TAGE: You guys already hand out all of the Halloween candy?
Britain: Y-yeah, a large group of kids came over.
Soviet: Totally
*his hat is filled with candy*
TAGE: Alright
*leaves*
Third:
QUICK EAT ALL OF IT BEFORE HE FINDS OUT
—
Britain/Third: Can you pass me a drink?
Soviet: Yeah sure
*tries to see which one is more empty to give it to them*
—
Britain: Is the blue fire cold?
Third: Yeah. You should touch it
TAGE in the other room:
Excuse me?
—
Soviet: This is my younger brother
*points to Third*
Soviet: He's a pain in my ass
I torment Britain
He torments Britain
I get a kill in the game
He gets a kill in the game
I'm not forgotten by my dad
He's forgotten by my dad
Great success
—
TAGE: As siblings, you guys must love each other
Soviet: Ew
Third: I never met these two in my life
Britain: I'm surrounded by idiots
—
Spain: You guys have an older brother?
He must be nice and protective
Third: He beated me up after I accidentally touch his Pepsi
Britain: He told me he would catch me if I fell when I was learning how to fly.
He never caught me once.
—
TAGE: UNITED KINGDOMS COME DOWN HERE!
Britain:
I'm so dead
Soviet: Let me guess I'm in trouble somehow
TAGE: YOU TOO UNITED SOVIET SOCIALIST REPUBLICS
Soviet: Call it
Third: I should be fine
TAGE: THIRD REICH YOU TOO
Third: THE ONE TIME I DON'T WANT HIM TO REMEMBER ME-
—
Kid!Soviet: Where did Mr.Teddy go?
Kid!Third: *has it*
Kid!Soviet: You dare oppose me mortal?
Kid!Third: yes
*And thus they hated each other from that point on*
—
Britain: *doing the dishes*
Third: *slowly puts a plate in*
Britain: You know what?
*grabs the knife in the kitchen*
Third: FUCK!
Britain: BRING YOUR ASS OVER HERE
—
Third: WHO THE FUCK ATE MY CHIPS?!
Britain with the bag of chips: Soviet did
Soviet: THIRD HE HAS YOUR BAG OF CHIPS NOT ME
—
Britain: Dad!
There's a monster underneath my bed and it's the most hideous thing ever!
Third who was forced to be at the bottom of the bunk-bed: Fuck you
Soviet with his own bed: Imagine having a bunk bed
—
TAGE: Who took my phone charger?
Third: Soviet did
Soviet: No Third did
Britain who has the phone charger: It wasn't me
—
Soviet: Get out of my room
Britain: Bitch we share the same room
Third: Soviet you're such a hypocrite
You hate the fact we share rooms but yet you tell us to share
—
TAGE: Do you want this?
Soviet: No
TAGE: Okay I'll give it to one of your younger-
Soviet: on second thought, I want it now
—
*in public*
Them when one of them gets bullied: How fucking dare you
*at home*
Them: *bullies each other*
—
Third: What the fuck did I ever do to you?
Soviet: Isn't it obvious? You were born
I was going to be the only child until you ruin my life by showing up
—
Britain: Siblings are weird.
At one point you want to strangle them
But then you end up discussing on how to jump some French person that we equally hate.
—
TAGE: *peacefully watching TV*
Kid!Britain: Dad can you untape us off the wall?
*the three are taped up to the wall*
TAGE: No
—
Third: Why am I named Third Reich if I wasn't the third child?
Britain: Third go to sleep
It's fucking 2:00 A.M in the morning
Soviet: No no no.
He has a point but I'm glad he isn't the third child.
—
TAGE: Britain? Third? Soviet? Where are you? Dad wants to go home and get dru-
Go to sleep!
Has anyone seen my sons?!
Oh Pangea..
Kids?!
That father's adrenaline is kicking in!
KIDS?!
TAGE backing up to the tree: I can see every equation!
*to some woman*
TAGE: S'cuse me ma'am have you seen my sons?
Two of them are this tall and one is this tall and I'm arranging one of them for a marriage but we haven't had the talk.
Are you guys in there?!
*snatches unattended coffee*
TAGE: Oh look, my luck's beginning to turn!
*takes a sip before spitting it out*
URGH!
WHO THE FUCK PUT SOY IN THEIR COFFEE?!
*to another person*
TAGE: Do you know where my children are?!
Do you- no?!
PANGEA DAMN IT!
BRITIANTHIRDSOVIET!!! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?!
I'll let you guys do drugs!
(Parenting 101)
KIDS!
I'm going to have a stroke!
WHERE'S THE PARK RANGER?!?!?!?!
Park ranger: Look I'm telling you they turned into animals I swear!
*pointing at the three*
Park Ranger2: I think you forgot to take your schizo pills.
Have you been questioning about this and not trying to find their pare-
*door busts open*
TAGE: WHERE THE F-
Oh there they are.
—
TAGE: *returns home after knowing an meeting was useless at 2:00 A.M*
*sees the three still up and playing minecraft*
TAGE: You three aren't supposed to be here.
Kid!Britain: Neither should you
—
*TAGE dragging them to a place they don't want to be at*
Kid!Britain: Are we there yet?
TAGE: No
Kid!Third: Sind wir schon da?
TAGE: Nein.
Kid!Soviet: мы уже на месте?
TAGE: Нет!
Kid!Britain:
Are we t-
TAGE: Dang it!
I swear to Pangea I'll turn this car around!
Them:
Yeah
That works. It'll teach us a lesson.
TAGE: Alright if that's what you wa-
*realization*
WAIT A MINUTE
—
Third: I only got four hours of sleep last night
Soviet: As I got 13 hours of sleep last night
Both: What's the difference?
Nothing
Soviet: We're both tired
Third: Absolutely fatigue
Britain: Well, move over idiots!
I'm you if you got the recommended amount of eight hours of sleep.
And I'm
Exhausted.
Soviet: Why say anything?
Britain: I really don't know why
TAGE: You guys get sleep?
YOU ARE READING
Country Shenanigans
FanfictionNOTE: This book was made two years ago or in 2023! So some old HCs and cringe will be in here that are not present today! Also WTF was my humor back then 😭😭🙏🙏🙏 Countries doing random stuff for our entertainment (100% not holding them hostage) H...
