Sex Bucket List • Tokyo revengers

Part 4 - Chapter 19

Mikey's pov

Her arms had been around me the whole ride.

I felt her press against my back, her forehead tucked into the space between my shoulder blades as we sped through the night, away from the chaos and sirens.

It had been the closest she'd been to me since I came back in time.

And it didn't mean anything. Not really. Because the moment I pulled the bike off the road and into this quiet, abandoned stretch, she slid off before the engine even stopped. Like being near me burned.

I watched her, silent, as she fumbled with her phone. Her fingers trembled as she brought it to her ear, turning away from me, pacing into the tall grass beside the road. The city pulsed faintly behind her, Tokyo's lights distant and indifferent.

Her mascara had run in streaks down her cheeks. Her lips were parted, shaking with breath.

I turned the key, and the engine cut out. The world felt even quieter without it.

"Y/N," I said, softly.

She didn't stop.

She tried to call him again. Rindou.

And again.

"Y/N," I tried again.

Still nothing. Just the sound of the dial tone repeating into the void, the ache in her silence.

After the fourth time, she just dropped the phone from her ear, arms hanging at her sides. Her back was to me. Her breathing was ragged.

I stepped forward slowly and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm sure he's okay," I said, but she jerked away like my touch stung.

"Don't," she whispered. But there was no edge to it. Just a tremor.

And then she dropped to the ground, arms wrapped around her legs, face buried against her knees.

I didn't know what hurt more: that she was crying like that, or that I couldn't hold her.

So I sank down in front of her, slow, like approaching a wild, wounded thing. I didn't reach for her. Not yet. I wasn't sure I deserved to.

"I know you're mad at me," I said. "You can hit me. Scream at me. Say whatever you want. But please..." I swallowed, my throat burning. "Please talk to me."

She lifted her head. Her eyes were red, glistening with tears she was too tired to hide. When they met mine, the world narrowed. My lungs forgot how to work.

"All I keep thinking," she started, her voice trembling, "is that Rindou wouldn't have lied to me like you did. Not about that."

The words cracked something open inside me. But she was not done.

"If he'd been in your position, if he'd been brought back in time—"

"He wouldn't have been in my position," I cut in, standing before I even realized it. The words tore out of me too fast, too raw. "Because you and him didn't have what we had in the first place."

She stood too, fire flickering beneath all that heartbreak.

"What did we have, Mikey?" she threw back, "A relationship full of lies? Where, when you weren't cheating on me, I was chasing after you and fixing your messes?"

I winced. It was like she'd reached straight into my chest and squeezed.

"I told you, I know I made mistakes in that other life—"