Akane Kuran: The Unwanted [Vampire Knight]

Chapter Forty-One: Mind Games

It was dead silent the whole time we were heading back to the academy, and even after. Ikuto's wound did heal, but there was still a nagging feeling inside my chest. Yuuki strayed off towards the Sun Dorms, shining her cheery smile as she waved goodbye.

Ikuto and I instantly headed towards the Moon Dorms. It was getting close to sun set so I wouldn't be surprised if some of the Night Class students were awake. We entered and went straight up to our dorm.

As soon as we got to our dorm I grabbed my uniform, went straight into the bathroom, and began to whimper. I slid down and wrapped my arms around my knees. It was all getting to be too much for me. No matter what I do something bad always happens. In this case Ikuto got hurt and Yuuki's life was in danger. Too add onto all that guilt my blood lust has been growing by the day and soon I'll have no control over it; which I'll try my best to make sure doesn't happen.

Maybe you should just give up, the voice crackled. Give in and all your pain and troubles will go away. You'll have enough power to hold your own. So nobody else will get hurt because of you.

Because of me....? I thought with a widened expression. No, I can't think of this right now.

Of course you can. You want to. I'm just here to help.

"No your not," I mumbled aloud.

Of course I am. I only want what's best for you dearest Akane. I know your deepest desires, the ones that you don't want to surface.

I didn't say a word.

You know, Akane you didn't tell Ikuto everything while at the same time you didn't tell your beloved friend Senri anything. Shouldn't friends be truthful to each other?

You wouldn't understand, I thought with a strained face. Nobody does nor will.

I do, the voice cooed slyly. I heard a giggle in my head. What are you so afraid of? That you'll go insane? Like your fa--- uncle?

Shut up, I thought sternly.

I'm only telling it how it is. Even you know I'm right.

The voice ceased after that. I had a few seconds of peace and quiet; enough time to collect my thoughts. That voice was right: I was afraid of losing my sanity. I've gone so long without drinking blood with my already low supply that I don't know what'll happen when I do. If that does happen I wouldn't want Ikuto or Senri to see me like that. I'd rather die than for them to see me lose my sanity and to not care for anything but blood. Also if I was in that state I wouldn't want to......hurt them.

I take the small package out of my shirt and examine it briefly. I knew they wouldn't work; but I still had to try. I open it and pop two white tablets in my mouth, which taste bitter and unsatisfying. After swallowing them whole I stand, quickly change, and exit the bathroom.

"I see you're ready," I said in a monotone voice directed at Ikuto. "We should probably head down."

Ikuto looked at me with one of those looks again before saying, "Yeah." He always suspects that something is wrong with me, which isn't wrong, but still.

We exit our dorm and proceed to head downstairs. Before we could, however, we were stopped before we could do so.

"Akane, we need to talk."

I turned and gave my brother a grim expression.

"Why?" I asked with anger in my voice. "I'm not going to have a personal chat with you after what you did to me last time."

"I won't ever do something like that to you again, Akane," Kaname said kindly. "I promise you that."

You're a liar, I thought.

However, even though I thought that, there was still a small part of me that believed his words. I don't know why, but I acted on that part.

Was I sick or something?

I looked away and huffed, "Fine. Ikuto, you can go down. I'll only be a second."

"But--" I sent Ikuto a stare and he sighed before heading down to the lobby.

I turned back to Kaname and said, "Well?"

"Akane, you already know that I know about that voice in your head. Has it said anything else to you?" Kaname asked concerned.

"No." I lied.

Kaname narrowed his eyes, "I know your lying, Akane. In fact, I assume that you heard it today."

"Well you are mistaken," I said slyly.

You're quite the liar.

"Akane, hearing that voice isn't good for you. All it's doing is telling you bad things."

"What do you know?" I asked sternly. "You didn't care about me before so why now?!"

Kaname sighed, "I'll always care about you, Akane. You're just confused."

"I'm not the one who is confused, you are! You said you'd love me forever but then you agreed to marry Yuuki! Is the only reason you care for me now is because she's dead and you want to fill the void in your already empty heart?!" I exclaimed. I felt on the verge of crying, crying. Of all the times I would do this it was here in front of the man who made me feel this way.

I knew better than to let it flow though.

"Akane, please---" I didn't want to listen to what he had to say anymore. I turned and walked away from him, but it wasn't long before I felt something grab my wrist, spin me around, and....

Plant a kiss on my lips.

I don't know why but I was grinning as I was writing the last part. I probably just made a lot of you guys confused. Don't worry, there is a reason for that. XD Anyway, thanks for reading!

-Lydia