A Little Bit Of Something (On-Going)

#40

(Cace)

She never fails to amuse me. What I like about her is that she always go to the ends of the world for the people that she loves. She always try to give them the best and make them feel special. Seeing her perform the song she personally chose for her twin brother, when her voice cracked but still continued, when her emotions were starting to take over her but she never stopped. Jonnie and her willpower is truly admirable. It's not easy to learn the piano, it's not easy to learn a foreign language, much more learn the dance steps and perform it live. And the fact that she squeezed those preparations in her day to day life must be really exhausting.

   I admit, it struck me when she cried while singing an upbeat song. I wanted to know what's in her mind that exact moment, she must have been proud of herself too, she must have been tired as well, or must have been moved by the words she sang while looking at her brother.

   It amazes me how this woman never runs out of charms.

   I guess it's just right that I delayed my confession until Peter's wedding is over. I didn't want to burden her on the day of her twin's wedding. Kung tinuloy ko ang plano ko, without the knowledge that she's been mentally and physically exhausted with the preparations for her surprise for Peter, it would be so selfish of me. Hindi fair na umamin ako para lang makahinga na ako nang maluwag at ipasa sa kanya ang pasanin.

   The last thing I would want her to feel is to be uncomfortable.

—

Saturday, 9th of May, I was just at home. GoGoBoys' current album has been on repeat since morning. It would be a lie if I said the title track didn't play a huge part as I was coming up to a decision whether to confess or hide my feelings; because it did. As soon as I read the English translation, I told to myself that's it. I'm going to make my move and just be completely honest with her and with myself.

   The next thing I knew, I was already at their house's driveway, around eight in the evening. GoGoBoys' Again was still playing as I wait for Jonnie to come out, when she replied to my text that she's already about to get out of their main door, I too hopped off my car.

   There she was, donning a faded pink T-shirt with a bold statement that says "I'm awesome" and a gray pajamas pants. Hair down. She was holding her mobile phone on her left hand.

     "Ba..bakit?"

   I snapped back to reality.

     "Mom cooked some pasta. Naisipan ko na dalhan ka since I saw your tweet you're craving for some Italian food."

   Napatingin siya sa inaabot ko'ng paperbag. I caught a glimpse of her soft smile.

    "Salamat. Pakisabi kay Tita, salamat. Ay, ako na pala mismo magmi-message sa kanya."

   Tumango ako.

     "May...may kailangan ka pa? Gusto mo ba muna'ng pumasok? May gusto ka ba'ng kainin? Inumin?"

     "I came here to tell you something important."

     "Ano 'yun?" napakamot siya nang leeg.

     "I like you."

   Natigil siya, her hands dropped both on her side.

   Pabilis na pabilis na rin ang tibok ng puso ko. I was looking right through her eyes. Jonnie still in shock, didn't say a thing but just stare at me.

     "I like you, Jonnie. I've been feeling this way since weeks ago and have been weighing things whether to tell you this or not. Whether to take a leap of faith or play safe."