Space Bound (Eminem)

This is it

Chapter 84

Marshall and I have been separated for almost two years now. Those have been the two most horrible years of my life. We tried working it out, but it just never worked. Poor max was so devastated and I saw how it hurt him if he had to leave his dad after his weekend visits.

I wanted to move away, but Marshall made me move into a house not 20minutes away from him. He was afraid that I wouldn't let him see Max at all. We fought a lot, but I would never do that to him. What Marshall didn't get was that I was still very in love with him. Just wished he felt the same.

The girls still came around to visit. I felt terrible for doing this to them, but I just couldn't handle the fighting anymore and when Marshall suggested we have a break, I didn't want to, but maybe the space made him realize how much we need each other.

Even separated we still had huge fights, mostly about Max and Kevin. Yeah Kevin and I were good friends, but I wasn't in to him like that. We were just friends and he was there for me when others weren't. Like Denaun didn't want to get involved, neither did the other guys. Said they couldn't pick sides and I respect them for that. I just wish Proof was here though. He would've known what to do.

Marshall wanted me to go over to him today to talk about Max. He didn't say what it was about Max, just to come and keep an open mind. I just hope it didn't turn into a screaming match. Again. I got ready and then called for Max to come down so that we could leave for his dad's. He was quite excited about going there. I have no idea why.

"Mommy?" I glanced in my rear view mirror at a very concerned looking Max.

"Yes?" I asked tentatively.

"Are you and Daddy going to fight again?" He asked and I had to take in a sharp breath. The look on his face was killing me. Like I know the fighting had been killing him and me.

"I don't know baby. You know Mommy and Daddy have been in a bad place. But Mommy will try ok? No more fighting." I said giving him a small smile. He returned it then nodded. I gripped the wheel tighter and felt my eyes glaze over. Marshall and I haven't been in the same room for the past 6months for longer than a few minutes. This was going to be difficult.

I punched in the code by the gate and the gates opened up for me. I bit my lip to try and keep the tears at bay. Through out the whole separation, I have not been here once. Marshall usually picked Max up and dropped him off. I pulled up to the front door and sat in the car, just staring at the house I used to call home.

I have no idea how long I was sitting there in my own little world. There was a tap on the window, which made me jump in my seat. I put my hand on my chest to calm myself down as I rolled down the window.

"You just gonna sit there or come in?" Marshall asked with Max in his arms. I didn't even notice Max get out of his car seat and go to the door.

"Sorry." I mumbled and rolled up the window. Marshall nodded and turned to go back into the house. I got out the car and walked up to the open front door. I took one last deep breath before entering the house. I wanted to just burst out in tears at one glance at everything. I swallowed back all emotions and stood there like the idiot I am. "Max?" I couldb've called out for Marshall, but that just seemed wrong to me.