Regret Me

Ness

Day 3 of my glorious plan to find out why Lizzie would sleep with another bitch when she was dating me.

Today was the fireworks display in Central Park. I know I suggested doing it on my roof, but I quickly decided that was a bad idea. I know Lizzie and if she's still the same girl I think she is, she will use the alone time to her advantage. She will use the fact that we are alone and, in some way, manipulate me into getting with her or worse ... falling for her. I couldn't let myself sink back into that place. I knew my worth now and it was so much higher than Elizabeth fucking Olsen.

I woke up a few hours before midday to the New York sun shining through my floor-to-ceiling windows. Making a note to get some good blinds, I covered my head with my pillow and groaned. My tank top from the night before had shifted dramatically and was now sitting between my breasts, both of my tits completely hanging out. When my phone started ringing, I moved the pillow away from my face and picked up the small Apple device, Vanessa's name flashing across the screen. With it being 10 am here, it was 3 pm there – in Sunday London terms, it was roast dinner time. Furrowing my brows, I pressed answer and heard her sniffling down the line.

"Ness?" I asked, sitting up and covering my chest despite the fact I was still alone.

"Hey babe," she mumbled.

"Are you all right?" I pushed.

She hummed a no, "shit did I wake you up? I'm so sorry, what time is it there?"

"No, no, it's okay. It's just gone 10 ... what's up?" I questioned, rubbing the sleep from my eyes and resting my back on the headboard of my bed.

"I really miss you," she sniffled.

I bit my cheek and nodded to myself, "yeah ... I miss you too."

"I um- I know we're not together b-but do you think I could come and visit you? Maybe we could make it work?" she asked.

I thought for a moment and nodded again, picking at my bed sheets where they sat on my knees which were now bent upwards.

"It's only been four days, it was always going to be hard baby," I sighed, leaning my head back.

"But maybe we could make it work this time," she suggested, "we could be with each other more or- or we could do more coupley things ... we never went on many dates."

"Ness, we went on countless dates," I mumbled, my eyes becoming glossy.

"I know," she whispered, more like she was trying to convince herself, "so you don't want to give us another try?"

"I um- I don't know," I groaned, "I really love you; you know that. You know that I'll always love you b-but there was a reason we ended things."

"I know," she frowned, I could practically see the upturned smile on her perfect lips, "we had a good run though, didn't we?"

"We were fun," I agreed, stifling a small laugh, "I'll always have your back."

"You too," she nodded, "have you um- have you started work yet?"

"Not yet, I start tomorrow but I've already made a new friend," I smiled.

"Yeah?" she sighed with relief, "good, I'm happy for you ... you're going to do great things Y/N/N."

"Keep me updated with your life, okay?" I sniffled, quickly wiping the tears that were falling down my cheeks.

"I love you," she mumbled.

"I love you too baby," I sighed.

"I'm sorry for calling like this ... I won't- I just- I- I'm trying to live without you but it's really fucking hard. You're such a big character and now I feel like there is a gaping hole where you were," she sniffled, spilling her heart out.