begin again | woosan

- seventy nine -

tw / panic attack & a tiny bit of unintentional self harm

"i'm really glad you two made the trip out here, honey," the boy's mom said.

san was helping wooyoung's father with something outside, wooyoung sat on a barstool as his mother cooked lunch for the five of them.

"i'm glad we did too... i-i was supposed to meet san's parents this weekend, actually. they live pretty far so it's harder for us to go see them."

"why didn't you two end up going?"

"something came up and his dad had to leave on business for the weekend. his parents want to meet me at the same time, so we had to figure out something else to do for the weekend. i had been thinking of coming to visit anyways before san asked if i wanted to meet his parents so that definitely made it a little easier."

"mm, i see. can you do me a favor?"

"yeah... what's up?"

"go tell kyungmin to wash up, i'll tell the two outside."

"okay..."

wooyoung got up and headed upstairs, where kyungmin was playing games on his switch.

"kyungie?"

"hi hyung! look at what i'm playing!"

out of nowhere, wooyoung started to feel panicky, doing his best to focus on the boy sitting in front of him.

"t-that looks great, kyungie... m-mom made lunch, okay? time to— t-to wash up..."

as every second passed, it felt harder and harder to breathe, and wooyoung just hoped kyungmin wouldn't notice.

"okay, hyung. are you okay?"

"i-i'll be okay... c-can you just get s-san?"

kyungmin nodded and wooyoung started to take his leave, only making it to the hallway before the panic consumed him. he dropped to the ground and started sobbing, struggling to breathe and not sure what was real versus not anymore.

at the sound, kyungmin ran out of his room and sat next to his big brother, scared but wanting to do anything he could to help.

"wooyoungie hyung... what's wrong?"

"i-i— s-sannie..."

"but—?"

kyungmin was interrupted by wooyoung giving a loud whimper, and the boy felt tears welling up in his eyes.

"i-i'll get sannie hyung."

kyungmin ran down the stairs, finding san already seated at the table.

"sannie hyung! hyung, wooyoungie hyung needs you..." kyungmin cried.

immediately, san stood, briefly apologizing to the boy's parents before walking over to kyungmin.

"where is he?"

"u-upstairs... h-hallway."

"okay... thank you, kyungmin. he'll be okay, yeah? i promise."

kyungmin sniffled and nodded, walking over to get a hug from his mother as san made his way upstairs.

"woo... baby, hi."

"s-sannie?"

"yeah, it's me, love. can i hold you? bring you to your room?"

"p-please?"

"okay," san whispered, carefully lifting the boy up and bringing him to his room.

it was there that san noticed the boy was digging his nails into his arm as hard as he could, gently lacing their fingers so he couldn't hurt himself anymore.