Kpop Sickfics and Hurtfics Part 2

Behind Closed Doors (Jaehyun)

BOYNEXTDOORThe dorm was quiet, save for the rhythmic hum of the air conditioner and the faint sound of someone practicing choreography in the corner. Jaehyun sat at the kitchen table, his laptop open in front of him. His eyes skimmed over an email from their management, outlining another packed week ahead—group practices, music show appearances, a variety show taping, and his solo schedule as an MC.

He leaned back in his chair, rubbing his temples as the weight of it all pressed down on him. Lately, it felt like there was no room to breathe. Being the leader of BOYNEXTDOOR was an honor, but the responsibilities that came with it were starting to feel heavier than he could carry. His days were a whirlwind of schedules, decisions, and maintaining the upbeat, reliable image he knew the members and fans looked up to.

“Myung puppy, you okay?” Sungho’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts.

Jaehyun glanced up, forcing a small smile. “Yeah, just looking over next week’s schedule.”

Sungho raised an eyebrow, unconvinced. “You’ve been staring at that screen for an hour. Don’t you need to sleep?”

“I’ll sleep in a bit,” Jaehyun said lightly. “You go ahead.”

Sungho hesitated before nodding, his steps retreating down the hallway. Jaehyun let out a quiet sigh, his smile fading as soon as he was alone again. He glanced back at the screen, his chest tightening. How could he possibly juggle everything and still be the leader his members deserved?

Later that night, as the others were fast asleep, Jaehyun remained at the table, staring blankly at his reflection in the dark window. His thoughts were a chaotic tangle—what if he wasn’t doing enough? What if he let the group down? What if he wasn’t cut out for this?

For the first time in a while, a tear slid down his cheek. He quickly wiped it away, scolding himself. Leaders didn’t cry.

He turned off the laptop, dragged himself to bed, and promised himself he’d do better tomorrow.

The following days passed in a blur of schedules and performances. Jaehyun found himself on autopilot, going through the motions with a practiced smile plastered on his face. To anyone watching, he was the dependable leader who always had it together. But inside, he was unraveling.

It started with small moments—his vision would blur as tears pricked his eyes during rehearsals, but he’d blink them away, claiming the studio was too dusty. At a variety show recording, his voice caught during introductions, and he quickly laughed it off as a dry throat, reaching for his water bottle to hide the lump forming there.

The members began to notice.

“Hyung, are you okay?” Woonhak asked one morning as they rehearsed their choreography for the third time. Jaehyun had paused in the middle of a move, his shoulders trembling slightly.

“Yeah, just tired,” Jaehyun replied, plastering on a smile. “Let’s run it again.”

Riwoo furrowed his brow. “You’ve been saying that a lot lately. You sure it’s just tiredness?”

“It’s nothing,” Jaehyun said firmly, walking over to restart the music.

But the cracks were growing harder to hide. During a live broadcast, Jaehyun felt a wave of emotion welling up out of nowhere. He quickly turned his head, pretending to adjust his mic, and took a deep breath to steady himself. He joked about needing more sleep, earning laughs from the viewers and the members, but Riwoo shot him a concerned look.

The worst came one evening after a long day of schedules. The members were eating dinner together, laughing and chatting about the funny moments from their taping earlier that day. Jaehyun sat quietly, poking at his food, trying to ignore the tightness in his chest.