Tracy, a huge Ghost Adventures fan finds herself thrown in the thick of it. Both a passionate relationship and a demonic connection nobody could ever have predicted evolve. How will Zak, Tracy and the crew cope with this new and bizarre situation? W...
"Can we talk?" Zak asks refusing to look me in the eye his face solemn. I nod.
"Errr I'll leave you two to it." Aaron gets up and Zak takes his place on the lounger opposite me.
"Thanks dude!" I smile at Aaron who winks at me and gives me a thumbs up behind Zak and walks off phone in hand no doubt snapping the silly pictures and videos we took of our cocktails and his decorated beard.
"I was a douchebag." Zak states as soon as Aaron is out of earshot.
"Yeah you were." I agree wondering if I should give him any slack but then I remember how he spoke to me and I bite my tongue to stop the anger from raising its ugly head again.
"I said some shitty things." He continued, unaware of my internal emotional battle swinging between wanting to slap him upside the head and leaping on him and begging forgiveness.
"You sure did." I agree again.
"I hope you can believe me when I say I'm so sorry Tracy, I really am." He rests his elbows on his knees and rubs his face, the worry etched into his expression can't be hidden and the ice in my heart begins to melt.
"I believe you." Not trusting myself to say more just yet, I am still pissed with him but I can't not let him know that we'll be ok.
'It was coming from the right place I promise you, it just came out wrong." He started to explain and I can't hold back any longer.
"It sure fucking did Zak, call me stupid and then try and tell what to do, you pushed two of my biggest buttons right there boyo, but I guess you realise that now hey?"
"Damn straight I do! But I deserved it, I shouldn't have spoken to you like that at all. But I was scared for you, I am scared for you! I want to help you Tracy, I can't protect you if I don't know what's going on."He implores me.
"I know, I get where you're coming from I do. And i'm sorry for reacting the way I did and for some of the things I said back to you. But fuck Zak that was pretty fucked!"
"I know."
"And you need to give me some credit for being able to deal with this crap. I can't just depend on you being there all the time." I can see he wants to interject but I don't let him. "Don't get me wrong I know I can rely on you to be there for me and I love you for it. But you won't physically be there all the time, that would be impossible even if we lived in the same city, let alone when we're seperated by half of the world." I push down the pang that comes every time I think of him being so far away from me. "But I promise I will always talk to you about it, I only hesitated earlier because I didn't want you to worry. I wasn't trying to be deceptive or gun ho about it. I do understand how serious it is I promise." I search his face trying to read what he is thinking.
"Thank you for explaining that for me sweetie. You're right I should trust you more, you're far from stupid I didn't mean that, i'm sorry."
"Hey look at me!" He still hadn't looked me in the eye and it was making me sad. "I accept your apology and I apologise for the horrid things I said, I reacted badly and I find it so frustrating that you blame yourself so much. You know I don't blame you right?" He nods although not entirely convincingly.
"Yeah, can't say I understand it though." He shakes his head frowning.
"Please try for me, I don't want to be a constant source of guilt for you,that would really suck." I screw up my nose and he finally looks at me and I relish seeing those eyes again
"I'll try , I promise. I'm just happy that you're talking to me I was so scared that I had properly fucked up and you wouldn't want to know." He admits.
"Wel lI hate to burst your pity party pinatta but it will take more than a little spat to get rid of me Bagans. Geez even a demon hasn't off ya idjit, so looks like you're stuck with me." I joke and Zak finally smiles.
"Yeah, I knew you were crazy." He winks and I scowl.
"And a bitch?" I ask trying not to laugh.
"Yeah but a pedigree one, that's the best kind of bitch!" He laughs, the tension is dissipating between us but I can see that there is still an air of sadness about him.
"So we're good Zak, you can stop worrying." I try and reassure him.
"But I was so worried Tracy! I'm sure you know enough about my past to know this kind of thing has scared people away before, its been at the back of my mind since it happened that it would all become too much for you and you'd leave. I don't think I could handle that. I can't shake that feeling you know?" The anguish evident in his words twists like a knot in my stomach.
"I know babe, but i'm here to stay, I promise." "Sweetie?" "Yeah?" 'You don't really think that i'm going to run back to Vegas and forget about you do you?" Its my turn to feel scared and worried, I shrug my shoulders not wanting to face those fears.
"Its been playing on my mind since as soon as we started getting close. It'll be different and hard when we're apart and back to our normal lives and you'll have a whole lot more distraction than I ever will." I think of the party town that he calls home, the fan girls, the exes and public appearances. I really can't help but be nervous. He's the famous Zak Bagans, gorgeous and way out of my league, a notorious flirt, known to be available with a whole heap of temptation right on his doorstep. Yeah I was worried.
"Hey you are not getting rid of me that easily either." He places his hands on my knees making me look up at him. "I know I have a bit of a reputation." To his credit he blushes at this. " But I am all in on this, I want to make this work. This is for real. I love you Tracy! And I don't say the 'L' word easily. I don't say it unless I know I really mean it, and I do mean it sweetie. I'm not leaving you, I couldn't, it would destroy me. We'll work something out." He says with such sincerity that I leap up and into his arms much to his shock and amusement. I bury my head in his shoulder, biting my lip to hold back the tears.
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"You don't know what it means to hear you say that, I've been so scared."He cradles me in his lap and shushes me.
"I'm not going anywhere, even if we are physically apart you'll always be with me, I promise." He whispers as he strokes my hair. I lean back to look at him and the sincerity in his eyes makes my breath hitch.
"I love you Zak Bagans! Just don't call me stupid ya bastard!" I take his face in my hands and kiss him gently, he doesn't let me off that lightly and mashes his mouth against mine entangling his hand in my hair. He eventually breaks away and I try and catch my breath.
