Dragonball: Unforgotten

Chapter 33

Dragonball: Unforgotten

Chapter Thirty-three

You leaned off of a railing as you stared out at the city. Your stomach churned as you thought about everything you'd told them. You'd only meant to tell Gohan but the kid halfling, Trunks, overheard most of not all your story. He had found it neat. You did not. And while you had told them most things you did not tell tell them everything.

You did not tell them about how playful it had been; how you used to play games with Goku to pass the time when you and he were looking for the balls. You did not tell them how safe and at peace you felt in his arms while riding atop of Nimbus. Or at any other times really. You did not tell them about his curious mind or how awkward and embarrassed you were to answer all of his questions. You did not tell them the intimate way that he started to teach you about how to use your ki. Nor did you tell them about sleeping next to him, often in his arms, even when you didn't have to. Or how you always woke up knowing that, that felt right. You did not explain the look in his eyes when he saw another man's hands on you or the shiver that him claiming possession caused. Nor the night that followed. Or about the realization of how igniting his lust happened. And you definitely hadn't told them about being married before what was effectively the god of Earth. Not to mention you left out quite a big part of it that even you had a hard time facing.

With all of that omitted it felt like you were somehow lying to them. You didn't like that feeling. But for Gohan's and his brother's sake you had to. They were innocent in all of this mess. Gohan might be like your age, or so it felt, but Goten was just a little child. You didn't want to break his home up.

It didn't matter that Goku wasn't alive anymore, that he wasn't a physical presence. It was the spirit of him, the symbol, that you didn't want to tarnish in their eyes. You might be pissed at him because it was easier than the alternative. But even at your worst you didn't want to ruin what he built. He deserved to have his family and have them happy...

Besides the math wasn't on your side. It was your own personal emotions or the happiness of, at minimum, 3 people.

"Are you okay?" Gohan asked as he moved next to you.

"Fine," you answered half heartedly.

"You don't look fine, you look sad," the teenager pointed out, hands resting on the railing.

"I just...missed so much. It's hard. It felt like one minute and everything changed. I'm just...having a hard time rectifying everything in my head. There's so much to learn about this scary new side of the world. So much to learn about myself. And..."

You stopped yourself. It was selfish to say that you wanted Goku back in present company. Gohan was his son for gosh sakes. You'd only spent like maybe a third of a year with the man. Gohan had spent his early childhood with Goku. And not only that but to him he'd been dead a lot longer than he had been to you.

"You miss him," Gohan said quietly.

You didn't have to look at him to know that he had an understanding expression. You nodded and leaned forward, rocking on the heels of your feet.

"Until I got back to Earth...my best friend was still alive. I got here and poof, gone. And that wasn't the half of all the changes."

Gohan nodded in understanding as he remained beside you. He understood exactly how you felt. Or at least he thought he did. He had no idea what he and his family really did to complicate the torrent of negative emotions churning inside of you. He had no idea about the shocking pain that raced through you when you saw Goten clinging to Chichi's legs the first night you got back to Earth.