strawberries | brendon urie

54: "its just so much"

i'd put in a the famous record of pretty odd and northern downpour was playing. it matched my mood pretty well as i was crying my eyes out.

brendon: I can hear you

god dammit.

me: ignore it

brendon: See you in 2 seconds

i was about to wipe my eyes when my door opened and brendon walked in. he raised his eye brow at the cd.
"seriously?" he paused it. oops.
he closed the door and sat down next to me. "its just all too much. i hate this"
"i know it's hard. but you'll get through this. okay? you're already doing so well" he was so sweet...i felt terrible.
"how long though? its gonna be like this for a long time" i sniffled.
"and it'll be worth it. look, i never thought i'd be able be able to handle the split. or make it this far without spencer. but i did. okay, and you will to! you'll make it!" he said.
"it just doesn't seem worth it"
"i get that. but it will be. you can't force yourself though. okay?" i nodded.
"i love you" he wiped my tears away. "have you eaten?" he asked. i shook my head.

he went downstairs and came back with two sandwiches. he sat cross legged on my bed and gave me one.
"so...anyone new?" he teased.
"brendon. i have one friend and don't go to school" i pointed out.
"so? you met sierra in an ice cream store" he added.
"we don't say the S word in this house" my voice cracked a little.
"im sorry!" he gabbled, feeling bad.
"its okay" i punched his shoulder gently.
"no...i should leave" he got up to leave.
"no! please stay!" i begged.
he sighed. "im sorry"
"brendon its fine. i love you" i finished my sandwhich and hugged him.