The Broken Blonde

Chapter Eighty-Three

That night was by far the hardest, watching him break in my arms was more difficult than I could even comprehend yet it was the morning I was dreading the most, waking up to see him once again brush the entire thing off as one big mistake. I stayed up the entire night holding him close, his cries muffled until eventually there wasn't any, I did what I could do and even though I knew it wasn't much at least he wasnt alone.

I couldn't say what time he fell asleep; all I know is that he drifted off not saying a single word to me. I didn't blame him, I never did, but it was only then when I realised how messed up he was I started to gain the sympathy I had never thought twice about. It was hard knowing he'd never admit to anything and it slowly spread like a disease onto me, seeing how he handled things made me feel pathetic even though I knew it wasn't normal. I saw that he didn't get affected by the things I thought to be a big deal so why should I but last night told me that it did affect him just not in the way that it was visible to the eye.

It was starting to get light outside and I knew he'd be waking up any time soon, I dreaded it, a part of me hoped we could just stay like this forever but I knew when the sun arose so would his predictable stern mannerisms. My throat was dry like the life had just gotten sucked out of me and my eyes were heavy, extremely heavy but I refused to close them. That was when I felt his head move.

I glanced down as he turned his head, his hair brushing up against my chin. I felt his hand brush the side of my arm, so I raised it hovering for a moment above his back, cold and exposed I stroked his delicate skin. He shuddered under my touch his hand holding mine but not for long, he quickly raised his head sitting up as he looked down at me. His eyes bloodshot and red glimmering with regret while looking at me, I stared into them my heart dropping the more I got lost in them.

His eyes then darted around the room and for a moment he wasn't able to recall where he was, it was when his eyes landed on the diary when everything flooded back to him. His face dropped as he stood up brushing his hands violently through his hair now facing the window, I sat up and made my way over to the side of the bed raising my hand gently touching his back. He flinched and stepped to the side abruptly looking down at me eyes wide, I couldn't imagine what was going through his head.

"Draco you can talk to me about last night" I said softly not wanting to startle him anymore than I already have, I didn't want to push him but then again, I wanted to get him to finally open up. Though never the less, he ignored me and neared the windowsill opening it, instantly getting a cold breeze waft into the room. I shivered as I felt it on my bare skin, I grabbed the duvet and draped it over my shoulders staring intently at the back of his head just waiting for a reply.

"Look I know you don't want but youve put it off for too long" I said this time a little more insistent, I watched as his hand clenched the wooden trim around the window revealing his harsh veins that were now visible because of his pale skin. He paused; I could hear his breathing from where I was sat but eventually, he moved. He paced up and down the room fiddling once again with his rings looking completely out of it, he glanced down at the floor to see my jumper laying messily on the ground crouching down to pick it up.

"Its hard but once you've told someone it-"

"I don't want to hear it. Okay?" He shouted cutting me off, his hands held high, one holding my jumper. They covered his ears slightly as if he were trying to shut out the truth, couldn't bare reliving any of it so instead he done exactly what I expected. He acted like none of it ever happened.

"You never do, its not surprising Draco but you can't hold it in forever" I was becoming more irritated the more he shut me out, pretending like it never happened isn't only going to just weigh down on him but it'll make me feel helpless knowing he'll make himself live with that no matter how difficult it'll be.

"I can very well try" He spat bitterly as he threw the jumper over at me, I caught it and watched as he headed towards the bathroom. I sighed and got up throwing the jumper over my head as I followed on after him, just as I was about to reach it, he slammed the door in my face making me take a step back.

"You cant shut me out forever Draco Malfoy" I yelled as I pounded on the door, I waited for a moment expecting a reply but there was nothing. I took a breath of defeat and made my way over to the bed picking up the diary, I cursed it under my breath and began to flick through it finding an account for almost every time someones ever made me feel more than satisfactory. Though what made me more confused was the fact it was impossible for me to write all of them since the times these took place I hadn't any idea where the diary was.

As flicked through reaching the end I stumbled upon a new account, the ink still fresh splodging across the page opposite, it was a description of last night, far more detailed than the rest. It only confirmed to me that I wasn't the one writing them though they portrayed how I felt perfectly, a little too perfectly that they were in fact my own words. That was when I realised, the thing writing in my book wasn't a person, it wasn't human at all, it was the book itself. It somehow latched itself onto me ever since I was gifted it at Hogsmeade, after all the woman did say the book chose me. My eyes began to water as I reread last nights events but as I was about to read on I heard the door unlock, Draco rushing out catching me with it as he did so.

I only realised when he glanced down and scoffed in disbelief looking at the book in repulse as he made his way around the bed, I flung it out of my hands and shuffled across the bed sitting next to him as he put on his shoes. He refused to speak a word until he stood up, making his way towards the door. I grabbed his hand pulling him back forcefully refusing to let him leave again, I wasn't going to let him leave this room in the state that he was in partially because I didn't know if he'd ever return.

"Please" I murmured desperately wanting answers, he looked back at me hesitantly, scared to what would happen if he did, but I could tell he was contemplating it by the way his eyes skimmed mine frantically. He was so close to giving in before we both heard the familiar cackle coming from down the hall.

Before I even got the chance to catch on to what was going on Draco shoved me back, his hands quickly pushing against my chest hard making me stumble back into the window but before I was able to catch myself I was already falling, the last thing I saw being Dracos wide eyes sinking in fear. Everything went so fast and next minute I felt myself grasp on to dear life to damp wooden ledge outside of the inn, I shut my eyes tight feeling my feet dangling off the edge the cold air drawing to me like a magnet. I managed to raise my other hand tightly clenching the panel, my upper body strength being the only keeping me alive and I knew it wasnt going to last long.

"Where's the girl?" I heard a familiar voice shriek from our room, the high-pitched croaky tone making the scars on my arm pulsate as if they knew whoever caused them was close, it was Bellatrix. I knew not to yell for help or pull myself up knowing that if I did so my fate would be a lot worse than breaking a few bones.

"The woods, I left her there" Draco said his voice trembling but still able to come across as convincing enough, I heard her loud heeled boots pace the room slamming doors and draws until she was fully satisfied that I was no where to be seen. And without another word there was silence, they had gone, and they took Draco with them.