The Broken Blonde

Chapter Fifty-Seven

I was stupid to think I'd ever be able to work willingly with the Dark Lord, I obviously was too blinded by my sympathy to think of the consequences. I mean it all happened so quickly and now Im reminded every day that I wasn't able to escape it, the imprint imbedded into my arm and the necklace that was clasped around my neck never letting me forget. After all what am I in all of this, its not like I'm much help, I'm just another one of his pathetic followers willing to do anything with fear that he may kill me if I won't.

All my life I've been taught to avoid the Dark Arts knowing that is was something you should never mess with and the people that have are to be avoided at all costs but I fell into trap, now being one of those who you are told to avoid. And I did this for what, a boy who constantly pushes me away but holds me close when I'm most vulnerable?

Its times like these that I wish I hadn't taken any notice of him; I should have just minded my own business and he'd never had batted an eyelid at me but who was I to blame him. Its not like he forced me into this, the more he tried to warn me the more attached I got, I couldn't help it he was like a drug I couldn't get enough of him. I didn't want to watch him go through this alone and now look where I am.

We just arrived back at the manor Draco immediately pulling away from my arm, it was like he wanted to be nowhere near me fleeing as soon as he is told something he doesn't want to hear. I wanted him to talk to me for once slowly becoming more irritated the more he distanced himself away as if I was an heirloom for all of his problems and I hated it. I stood and stared as he once again stormed off this time heading to the front door, I couldn't be bothered putting up with his bullshit anymore so I hurried behind him running down the porch while it was teaming down.

"You've got to be joking! You cant just storm off as if this is my fault" My scream being to loud for the rain to mask, though he didn't stop to take any notice of me, instead walking faster into a small courtyard enclosed by overgrown hedges. The rain was heavy, and I was already drenched as if I was just tossed into a lake and managed to crawl my way out, but stupidly I ran in after him.

"Cut the bullshit Malfoy" I cried while grabbing his cold wet shoulder, his shirt almost see through by how soaked it was, I flung him around not able to see much of his face since the water created a barrier of fog. "Say something" I shoved him back with all the power I had left in me which clearly wasn't a lot since he only managed to stumble a few steps back.

"Theres nothing to be said, just go back inside you're wasting your time" He muttered harshly, I was just about able to hear him from the violent crashing of rain. I didn't know what I expected honestly, I was never able to get him to speak, he's difficult to say the least but I wasn't backing down anytime soon.

"I feel like all I do is waste my time with you Draco, all you do is brush me aside as if I haven't any clue what you're going through but the whole reason I went through with this in the first place was to at least try to understand" All I wanted was for him to realise how much effort I actually put in trying to comprehend in the slightest where he was coming from.

"I didn't ask for you to do this for me, maybe I am a waste of your time after all whats the point in trying to explain to you anyway its not going to change anything" His eyes grew slender and sharp cutting deep into mine, I felt like there was nothing I could say that'll in anyway lead him to open up to me. Thats all I wanted,

"You're right it wont change anything so why are you finding it so difficult to just tell me. For fucks sake Draco I've just been told have to give one of the only people that was there for me over to the Dark Lord and the only thing I'm asking for right now is for you to just talk to me" My voice cracked with just the thought of betraying one of few that stood up for me knowing that if I didn't there was a chance of losing the one man I truly cared for.

"I hate that you're here, I hate that you followed me here and I hate feeling like I led you here, is that good enough for you Y/n?" The tone in his voice was different, he wasn't angry he was desperate, and I didn't want to admit that maybe I'm the one that caused all of the stress in the first place.

"It was my decision Draco, I put myself up to this but if you dont want me here then I'll leave" I heard the faint sound of thunder near by knowing a storm was gradually approaching, I stood for a second trying to read him but he made it so difficult, it felt as if I was talking to a wall and a part of me wanted to give up. I glanced away from him in defeat looking down at my hands that were dripping with water, I took a deep breath knowing that this argument was hopeless and began to make my way back to the manor.

Though I only managed to make it a few feet away before his cold but gentle hand wrapped around my dainty wrist pulling me back towards him, I looked back my face only millimetres away from his. I felt his hot breath brush against the tip of my nose instantly warming up my icy skin sending tingles through my entire body and with that he swept away the wet hair that covered my eyes tracing the side of my face softly reaching my chin.

He slowly angled it up, so I was now looking directly at his glassy eyes that craved nothing more than to be stared into, I parted my lips in hope he'd seal them with his. I must be easy to read since he quickly forced his lips onto mine almost instantly making the cold sensation that took over my entire body fade, the way he kissed me wasn't as familiar. He was soft but passionate not as rough or forward as the other times, it was as if it was his way of begging me to stay without being able to speak it. He followed my movements instead going at the pace I wanted to, I felt the rain fall down from his nose onto my top lip brining us closer together. Though before long out of the corner of my eye I saw a small strike of lightening flash over the trees, he gradually pulled away and peered down at the ground before walking off leaving me standing alone in the rain.

I didn't know what to think anymore, he had me wrapped tightly like a piece of thread around his finger. I just looked up into the sky letting the rain fall softly onto my face in attempt to piece together how he felt, one minute he acts as if he never wants to see me again but as soon as I finally come to terms with it and do what he asks thats when he contradicts everything he'd just said. I never truly knew what he wanted out of me, and at this point I was sure that his goal was to confuse me