"Are you sure you don't want to come?" Adam asks, packing his ring gear into his bag. The event was in Memphis, and it was Christmas Eve.
"I'm sure. Just drive safe" I smiled, watching him from the doorframe to our bedroom. Snow blanketed the driveways and highways, it was definitely going to be a white Christmas this year.
We getting high? Fuck yes.
"I will. You going to be okay?" he continues before frowning over at me, concern spreading across his face.
"I'll be fine. I'll watch a Christmas special, get some writing done then crash" I reply, lying. The last few days have been destroying. And he knew that. I hadn't cried or talked about what happened in the UK. I stared at the tv screen and ate junk. And he watched, trying to get something more out of me.
"If you're sure. I'm only down the road otherwise"
"Still, 4 hours away" I laugh
"Exactly, just down the road" Adam said, laughing
"I love you, I'll be fine" I say, trying to reassure him as he pulls me into his side
"I love you too. I'll be home in time for Christmas" he mumbles into my hair, kissing my head before heading downstairs to leave
Cocaine was lined on the kitchen counter next to a bottle of Jacks. My insides hurt from heartbreak and anger. Along with the large chocolate fudge cake that I ate to myself. Everything is a mess.
"Merry Christmas" I mumble to myself, snorting a couple of lines and grabbing the neck of the Jacks, taking it down to the basement.
Strumming on the guitar, I remember the long days. Long days with Janet keeping me awake. Long days that Janet has put me through. The feeling of it never ending. It's been a long day with her in my head all these years.
Long Day was written that Christmas Eve night. Before I worked on One That Got Away again.
I slept on the sofa by the light of the Christmas Tree. The evidence from the previous days activity in the kitchen cleaned. I still hated this time of year. But knowing that Adam will be here for it made for a peaceful rest.
I wake to an empty house. Adam hasn't gotten home yet. The answering machine flashes with messages.
'Hey babe, roads are snowed in at the moment. Will need to wait until light to get back. I'm really sorry. I love you, I'll see you soon.' Adam's voice plays through the speaker. I sigh, wishing I had taken him up on his offer to go with him.
'Merry Christmas Zo, hope the wedding went well' my mother's voice plays. I delete it before she could finish. I don't need her negativity right now.
Putting the kettle on, the sound making my head hurt.
We should have done more.
Oh, shut up, Janet.
Alone on Christmas, again. No one loves you.
He will be here. So, shut it.
I made my tea and started picking at the food in the fridge. The TV glared with MTV playing Mariah Carey and Band Aid. Anything to bring the feeling of Christmas into people's homes. Blankets of snow continued to line the long driveway as I stood outside on the porch.
"I hate Christmas" I mumbled into my mug of tea as the snow made my feet numb.
The kitchen clock ticked as I poured rum into a glass, sipping at it slowly. Watching the clock was just a torturous as watching the front door for Adam to get home.
Just after 2pm, Adam's car drove up the sludgy driveway. I was starting the drift off in the large study chair, having downed half a bottle of rum.
"Babe, I'm home" Adam yells out while he opens the door
I groan in response. Christmas is still the worst. "Welcome home" I sigh
Adam drops his bag and walks through the house, searching. This house is too big. There is too many rooms. "Babe?" Adam shouts down a hallway
Pushing myself out of the chair, I drag myself out of the room. There he stood in winter clothes and a Santa hat, his cheeky smile. Maybe Christmas isn't all bad?
"I'm so sorry for how late I am" he starts
"I'm just glad you are home" I smile, making my way to him as he opens his arms
"How was your night?" he asks, mumbling into my messy hair as his arms elope me
My night?
Oh yeah, the coke.
"It was fine, wrote some stuff. How was the event?" I answer into his warm woollen jumper cladded chest
"Terrible, actually" he says with a chuckle
Removing my face from his chest, I stare up into his hazel eyes, frowning. "Why's that?"
"The weather meant most of the audience wasn't there, nor stayed for the full show. And a bunch of the guys didn't make it to the show either, so the matches were rushed. Felt like a weird training session" Adam replies, "but at least I am home now for Christmas, just like I promised" he smiles and shrugs
"Well, welcome home, and Merry Christmas" I sigh happily, kissing his jawline
We ate turkey breast sandwiches as we lazed on the sofas, watching Jim Carrey's Grinch and a replay of the Queen's Christmas address, drinking expensive scotch.
Adam set up our new gaming console, plugging in WWF No Mercy. It was one of the first games he was featured on, an amazing moment, especially seeing him on the cover.
"I still can't believe they put me on the cover" Adam laughs while the screen loads with the menu.
"Well, you deserve it. You've worked you ass off" I comment, pressing on 'singles match' from the menu of gaming options
With a controller in our hands as we sat on the floor, we battle and laugh. The pixels fought while we frantically pressed buttons, trying to outdo one another. He smiles, looking at the screen then to me, as his character defeats mine.
"You win" I say, laughing before glancing over to him.
Carpet burn flared as we fucked on the living room rug. Christmas doesn't suck. But we sure do.
YOU ARE READING
Journey of a Lifetime
Fanfiction** A Little Bit Smutty ** You've been running away from your trauma all your life. The sex, the drugs - the addiction was all just a distraction. So what makes this runaway any different? Could it be the handsome man who strikes up a conversation wi...
