Almost Is Never Enough || Book I

Chapter 7

Almost Is Never Enough

Chapter 7

You rolled out there, enjoying the fresh air. "What's wrong Seev?" You asked.

"It's about your decision..." He started to say. You anxiously waited for him to continue. "It's mostly about Jay though..."

"Go on..." You said.

"He's really worried you know...about pressuring you to pick him." Siva said.

"You mean with him being suicidal?" You asked.

"It's not just that..." Siva sighed.

"Then what?" You asked, getting confused.

"Well last night he told me to come into his room to talk. He said that he felt as though he was pressuring you to pick him because you two made out in your room at the hospital...without Nathan knowing." He looked at you sympathetically.

You groaned and hid your face in your hands. "What am I gonna do?" You asked.

"Well it sounds like you're leaning towards Jay...he told me you were telling each other you wanted to be in his bedroom." Siva said.

You looked at Siva, your face was flushed red. "What if Nathan finds out about that though? I just don't know who I'm going to choose. Nathan has been so sweet and caring to me...what if I choose him instead of Jay?"

"I don't know," he said, "but it's killing them to see you kissing both of them without making a decision. And I think you should tell Nath about the hospital. If he finds out without one of you telling him, he'll be crushed." Siva said.

"That's not exactly the easiest thing to tell Seev..." You explained.

"I know, but you're gonna have to..." Siva said.

"What exactly am I supposed to say?" You whisper screamed, "I practically fucked Jay while you were getting me pills to make me feel better?"

Siva sighed. "I just don't know. Find some way to tell him nicely. Go somewhere where it's just the two of you alone, where you won't be interrupted. You have to do this." Siva said.

"I don't know even know why we did that in the hospital! It's like...something came over me...it was lust. And I felt bad because he had told me that he was suicidal but then at the same time, I love him." You said, practically in tears.

"But do you love him because he's suicidal? Are you wanting to be with him so he can stop? Do you really love him? Because he truly loves you." Siva said.

"I can't figure it out! I want him to stop and ever since we made out he stopped being depressed. And I don't want him to slip into a rut again. I love him. I loved him before I found out about his suicidal tendencies. But I love Nath too, and as long as I've known all of you, he was the one I loved." You said, fully crying now. "What am I supposed to do?"

Siva went over to you and hugged you, rubbing your back in an attempt to comfort you. "I know this will look bad on your part and on Jay's...but you have to pick him. I'm only saying this because Nathan doesn't have the same problems like Jay. Nathan literally has so many celebrities wanting to go out with him, so many fans. Jay only has you to make him happy and only you. If you don't pick him, we can try to stop him, but if none of us are with him all the time, he'll try something like he did a few days ago..." Siva was still hugging you as you were crying.

"But-Nathan's so sweet. I can't break his heart. And no offense but I don't think I can handle all of the hate! Do you realize how many people are gonna call me a whore and a bitch?" You sobbed.