Troublemaker [[JHS]] ✔️

66

As soon as I knew I was in the clear, I let the tears fall down my face. I leant against the wall and slid to the floor, covering my face with my hands. I was going to try and fight for Hoebag, but he made it clear he wanted Ami. That was fine. I just had to deal with my heartbreak. No one could help me out with that.

It was something I had to deal with alone.

"Idiot," I whispered to myself. I sniffed and looked up at the sky. The clouds were getting darker and I felt the first drops of rain. I close my eyes and let the rain mix in with my tears. I had never felt so pathetic. Never once had I cried over a guy like this. The only timed I cried over a guy was when they were beating me and when I lost my brother. 

I had never fallen so hard before and it hurt me.

No one was walking in the rain. No one left any building so I was left to cry by myself. I knew people were looking for me but they wouldn't find me. They probably didn't think I was stupid enough to sit by myself and cry in the rain. I just hoped Hana punched her sister and broke her face. That would make me want to smile, but right now. I had no reason to smile.

I felt broken and I would have rather taken a beating from Kang. At least with that, I knew I would heal properly. But heartbreak was something else. It made me feel sick. It felt like Hoebag has just ripped my heart from my chest and stomped on it. It just reminded me of the loss of my brother, Jaeho being trialled for murder and the pain that I had gone through growing up.

I may have had friends and a new family, but I still felt alone. Like no one understood me. I had thought that Hoebag understood me but I guess I was wrong. He only wanted one thing and he got it. Shit. I was so stupid.

I opened my eyes and the rain started to fall harder. The weather just represented how I felt but the rain calmed me, even when the first clap of thunder started. I felt it rumble through my body and I let out a shaky sigh.

"I'm so done with everything," I whispered to myself. I stretched my legs out and ignored the way my body shivered in the cold. I just stared at the puddles forming around me and how the rain made even my bones feel cold. I knew I couldn't be sitting out here for much longer without getting ill but I had no energy to move.

"Shit," I said, "You're so pathetic, Harley"

I pulled myself to my feet and slowly walked through the school grounds, ignoring the stares I got from people who were know running around. I knew I looked a mess but I felt it, so it didn't fucking matter.

By the time I reached the dorms, my teeth were chattering and I was making puddles with every step I took. I unlocked my door and stepped into the warmth. It was dark and quiet. Just what I needed. I dropped my wet clothes to the floor and pulled on some dry clothes. I sat on my bed and just stared at the wall opposite me.

I had never felt so weak before. I was always so strong and able to get over anything that came my way, but Hoebag ruined it for me. I needed to leave this school as soon as I could. Poppy would help me with that and I had a safe home to go to. Heejun would make sure that I never stepped foot in a police station again after being arrested.

I heard the door click open and I didn't bother looking at who it was.

"Harley," He said, and my heart dropped into my stomach "Where have you been?"

"Why would you care?" I whispered, "Go back to your girlfriend. Wouldn't want to keep Ami waiting"

"No. I want to talk to you"

I looked over at him and got to my feet "No. I don't want to talk to you. I'm done with the games Hoseok"

"Please. Please let me talk to you," He begged, "You have to listen to me"

I smiled bitterly at him "I don't chase anyone anymore. Wanna walk out of my life, there's the door. I'll even fucking hold it for you"

"Harley, you're being stupid now,"

"I'm being stupid?" I snapped, "How am I being stupid? You told me that you dumped her so you could be with me! But when she turned up you kicked me out of the room saying sorry. Then I see you and her all over each other. Oh, and to top it off you stood up for her. How could I possibly be stupid right now?"

"You don't understand, Harley," He said, "Ami is...she isn't well"

"And that gives you the right to chose her over me?"

"I haven't chosen her, Harley. I want to be with you," 

I scoffed "Of course you do. Being unwell has fuck all to do with-"

"She will kill herself if I leave her," He sighed, "Harley, you don't get it. She's sick"

"I want you to leave, Hoseok," I said, crying "And I don't want you to come back"

"I'm not leaving,"

"Just leave!" I screamed, "I can't take any more of this! I'm done with everything and I am done with the fucking school. As soon as you get out of this room you will never see me again"

"I will find you and I won't-"

"Just...just fuck off Hoseok," I said quietly, "I've been through enough pain and I can't go through any more"

He ran his hands through his hair "I'm sorry, Harley. I really am"

"Just go," I whispered, "Just go back to Ami"

"Baby please. Don't do this!" He said grabbing hold of me "You think I like what is happening?"

I turned my head away from him "I won't ask you again"

Hoseok dropped his hands "I...I'm...Harley, I love you"

I bit my tongue as more tears fell, but I heard the door open and close. More tears dropped but I took a deep breath and walked into the bathroom, staring at myself in the mirror.

"Maybe this world isn't for you anymore," I said to my reflection. I closed my eyes "You'll be seeing me sooner than you thought brother"