30 minute rule || Yoonmin

«58» The note

It seemed almost like deja vu, Jimin was once again in the art room with Min-Ju's folder in front of him. He wasn't going to go back to look at her art, instead he was going to read the note he found earlier.

Before Yoongi interrupted him he found a piece of paper with writing on it in Min-Ju's folder. As soon as it was free time he ran off, down the cold dark hallway and into the room which once had life. Which once held the happy smile of Min-Ju who would do anything to draw and color.

There was only two people in the art room yet they were by the corner drawing in silence. He took a deep breath as he walked up to the same table he was sitting at earlier that day. He pulled out the chair to sit and as he did so he reached out for the clean folder, which was void of color.

Something in him was scared like he didn't want to know what the note said but he knew he needed to take a look. His heart was racing and his hands started to sweat as he opened the folder to see drawings of all kinds messily laying all about. The letter wasn't seen right away, he had to sort threw different drawings of cartoons animals until he came across the white page, purple glitter pen writing and a couple small tear drop looking stains.

She was crying while writing this note. This was the last thing Min-Ju had wrote, her last thoughts spilled onto the clean white pages. He was tempted to hide the note and never read it but he knew he would never get closure that way.

He held the note with shaky hands seeing his name perfectly printed at the top like she had been planning this for a while.

He began to read.

Note:

Dear Jimin,

I know you would go back threw my art work so I decided to leave my...I guess you could call my suicide note. I wasn't close to anyone else in this clinic, you were my only friend. I didn't mind but things got tough around the time you fainted and stayed in your room for a couple days. Let me just start by telling you before you came to the clinic my health was not good, it wasn't even close to good. I would pass out almost every day, I got so dehydrated once I almost gone brain dead. The day before you came was even worse then all the days that I have gone threw, I had a fight with my brother who came to visit and he told me life would be better if I just died. That's why I had another family visit when you came, it was my mother, she wanted to tell me that I was worthless. She used to see me as a princess, her only daughter. I used to be the source of her happiness until she found out I had an eating disorder.

When you came I felt happiness, I was overly happy because I wanted at least someone to like me you know? If you didn't like me or tolerate me then what was the point? I felt so alone and worthless and it all seemed to go away when I would see you.

One night, two weeks before you passed out in the cafeteria I came up with a plan. That plan was to end things once and for all. Actually I wasn't going to go threw with it, i was holding it off because I thought that maybe, just maybe someone was out there to love me. Of course my delusional ass wanted Mr. Min but I knew that was too good to be true. I just wanted someone who new what I was going threw and that was you.

I found out I didn't need a boyfriend to be happy, I just needed you. So you passed out, I'm writing this during free time the day you passed out, you probably won't see this til I'm gone but I want you to know that I love you. You were always there for me so I thank you, for everything.

Stay strong for me okay? I don't want you hurting yourself because I left.

Love, Jeon Min-Ju ♥︎

He haven't noticed but once he set down the note new tear drop stains had been added to the page. His vision blurred by the tears pooled up in his eyes and his cheeks a light red from trying to keep his feelings in.

The note was so personal; just for him. The words she had wrote down were meant for Jimin and Jimin only, not to be sharedYes . He felt a sense of happiness, that before she left she took the time to explain things to him. Explain how she felt in the days leading up but if Jimin knew he would of tried harder.

He couldn't help but blame himself, he knew he shouldn't but he did. It wasn't his fault Min-Ju decided to take her own life but he could of tried harder to make her feel worth it and needed in those dark times.