A light || Ricky and Nini

Chapter 38

Nini POV

After we got home from the restaurant, I called my parents to ask if I could spend the day with Ricky. He needed someone to be with, and his father asked me if I could figure out how he's feeling about his mom. Mr. Bowen said that he didn't want to upset him any further but he had to know if he would be taking legal action against Lynne and I totally understood. When my moms said that I could stay the day with Ricky, I began to set up blankets around his couch as he put something more comfortable on upstairs. I sat down on the couch and so many memories came back, ones from our shared childhood where we would be each other's support systems. We sat on this couch together after heartbreaks, injuries, and when we needed comfort from one another. I'm amazed that some things have never changed between us. When I realize that Ricky is taking a while, I consider heading up to check on him. Just in time though, I look up to see Ricky coming down the steps and I smile as he walks over to me. "Here" he says softly as he hands me a sweatshirt of his. "I thought you might want to be cozy." I smile and laugh a little and look up at Ricky. His hair is messy and his face is slightly red. His eyes look bloodshot and it looks like he's been crying. His facial expression changes when he notices concern in my eyes and he mutters something that sounded like "I'm fine." I put the sweatshirt on the couch and walk over to him, fully embracing him in my arms. His body is tense but I feel him relax into me and breathe out against my beck. My hands run up and down his back trying to provide an unspoken comfort. I know he was crying upstairs in his room, and he came down trying to hide it. He can't hide it from me though and when I pull back, my eyes try to meet his, but he's making it impossible. I lead him over to the couch. "Hey" I say trying to get him to look at me. "Look at me" I say and his eyes finally meet mine. An intense amount of vulnerability is obvious in them and my hands find his cheeks. His eyes start to water. "See this is the point in which I'd ask Big Red for some alone time." He says with a chuckle. I smile. "No way in hell am I leaving you alone to be hurting by yourself." I say firmly. He nods, his hair flopping forward. "Plus... I give better hugs than Big Red." I say. He laughs and his eyes come up to meet mine. "You can be sad in front of me." I remind him softly. "I just, don't want to constantly be a burden." He says softly. "Oh my god, you're never one." I tell him. He looks down at the couch but I pull his head up in my hands. "No, look at me. This is a hell of a lot to go through and you can be sad and cry do whatever the hell you want around me. No filters and no pretending that you aren't in an immense amount of pain." I say to him. He tries to put his head down but I lift it back up to see he's tearing up. I arrange us on the couch so that I'm seated very much into him, and I wrap my arm around his neck, stroking his cheek and up through his hair. "Go ahead. Cry, love because I'm not going anywhere for a while." He doesn't say anything but I feel a tear drip onto my neck and I hold onto him a little tighter. He's shaking slightly and I don't have to look at him to know that his eyes are screwed shut and that he's still trying to contain his emotion. I remember the words that broke him down last time and all I say is "I'm right here." I feel him nod against my neck, his arms coming around me and he finally lets himself cry. My heart breaks but the expression is healthy and I just soothingly rub his arms and rock his body. I decide to just ask him straight out. "What do you want to do baby?" he knew I was referring to his mom and he snuggles deeper into my neck, pulling me closer. "I don't want to see her. Maybe some day, but not after what she's done to our family." I nod, not pressing anything and I just keep massaging his arms. "Does that mean-" I start. "Restraining order." He finishes. I nod. "For both my mom and Todd." I nod again pull his head out from where he's rested into my neck. I examine his tear stained face and I wipe my thumbs across his cheeks. Tears keep coming though and I don't know what to do to help. "What can I do Ricky?" I whisper. He shakes his head and pulls me into a hug. Immediately I hold him tighter, my head resting in the crook of his neck. I feel him completely relax into my body again, and as the scent of his cologne overtakes my own senses, I feel that same relaxation take over me. "I'm with you until the end. That's a promise." I say to him, nuzzling my nose into his neck. I feel his hand come up to the base of my neck, running his hands through the bottom of my hair lightly. The small movements that we are both making must be acting as a sort of comfort because he I feel him breathe deeply and whisper that he loves me. When we pull back he looks at me.

"I'm a mess" he says chuckling, wiping his face with his sleeve. I smile and push his hair back. "It's okay to be like that sometimes." I reach under the neckline of my shirt and pull out the promise ring that he gave me on a necklace chain. I hold it up to show him. "You know this wasn't just a promise you made to me. When I wear this, I'm promising you that I'll be around for every up and down, and that I'll protect you with everything that I am. His hands fly up to the ring around my neck and our foreheads come together to look at it. He takes a second, and then tucks it tenderly back under my shirt. Without saying anything, he pulls me into a deep kiss. All of his emotion from the last hour is channeled into this kiss and I feel weak, like my head is spinning. Ricky is intoxicating and after we pull back I rest my head on his chest. "Let's watch a movie." he says as he rubs my back. I nod against him and he laughs. "You know, I have to move to get the clicker." He tells me chuckling. His mood has improved, and his emotions have been expressed and after he gets the clicker, I scurry back onto him, making sure that he knows I'm never far as he deals with the stress and sadness in his life.