A light || Ricky and Nini

Chapter 3

Nini POV

The second I kissed Ricky everything started to melt away. Whenever he pulls back, I start to feel reality slip into my mind again and I just want something to fix me. As I kiss him, I feel little pieces of myself begin to be put back together. Ricky pushes up my shirt slightly so that he has room for his hands on my bare skin and the warmth excites me and heals me at the same time. As he runs his tongue against my bottom lip, I'm pulled deeper and deeper and all I want is something deeper with him. Suddenly, our clothes are too much of a barrier for me and I'm pulling Ricky's shirt off while connecting my lips to his jaw. He stifles a groan as I rake my hands down his toned chest and he pulls back to look into my eyes. "You're beautiful" he whispers in a raspy voice. I smile shyly at him and decide to pull my own shirt off, only to be hit with the cold air of the room and realize how exposed I am. I could feel Ricky's eyes on me, taking me in and studying me carefully. "Damn" he whispers, but all I'm focused on is his messy but perfect hair, and the way his pupils dilate from his place on the bed. I'm burning up and he knows it, and as quickly as our shirts came off, he's laying me on the bed kissing and sucking gently on my neck. My legs instinctively wrap around his waist and we're closer than we've ever been. I feel fire, and I feel want and he is fueled by the emotions rolling off of me. As his hands run up and down my sides I shiver slightly and lean up into him. When we pull back for air our faces are almost touching and he's balancing on his arm to keep his weight off of me. He stares past every insecurity and flaw of mine and he's looking at ME and it begins to make me feel a little uncomfortable. I blush and I bury my head into his neck and he murmurs "No, not this time love, you can't just go hiding, I won't allow it." and he gently pushes me head back to it's place on the pillow. His hands keep running up and down my sides starting at my thighs and back up to my stomach. I feel every single butterfly that resides in my body and I know what he's feeling just by the way he's looking at me. Despite his jeans and my skirt, I can feel him hardening beneath me the longer we stay shirtless and on top of each other. He's getting restless, and I feel him begin to rub against me. Just slightly, but he's watching me for forms of fear and panic. And, deep down, I do to panic. I don't know anything about having sex and he seems like he wants it. Even with my moms in the house, I know there are other ways to feel that pleasure and the panic begins to take over the butterflies and excitement that I felt just moment ago. Ricky notices right away. He feels my hesitation and fear. He looks me and brings one of his hands up to my cheek. "We won't do anything until you're ready, Nini. I want you to drive this." I nod and move my hand over his. "But  do you think we're ready... for something at least?" I whisper back, embarrassed and worried. "Not if you're not ready." And he kisses my temples and plants a kiss on my nose. "I just.. I just think that I don't want something as big as this to be a distraction. I want to be emotionally ready to comprehend what we're doing." I say. He looks into my eyes and grins while placing the most gentle kiss on my lips. "When you're ready, I'm ready babe." I nod and I pull him down right next to me and nuzzle against his chest. I'm almost sure that he's drifting off to sleep (considering the late hour) but I hear him ask me something quietly. "Nini, have you ever thought about doing it?" I don't even have to ask what he's talking about. "Sometimes I did... when we were still together. And a few times with EJ, more out of fear because he's obviously older and I thought he'd expect more from me." I try to explain, fighting embarrassment as we talk about the sensitive topic. Ricky tightens his grip around my waist. "No one should ever expect anything from you when it comes to that. But I'm also relieved to hear that I'm not the only one have those thoughts" he chuckles and I look up at him smirking adorably. I kiss him on the cheek and I cuddle back into him, and the last thing I hear before I drift off is the tiniest of whispers... "I love you."