A light || Ricky and Nini

Chapter 182

Nini POV

"Woah are you... you can't... no. Aren't you too old?" He bites out and Lynne grimaces, rubbing her stomach almost in defense. "Apparently not." She says and Ricky's entire body tenses up, like he's putting up armor against her. "What? What the fuck does that even mean?" Lynne is at a loss for words and Ricky looks between her face and her stomach. "You're like, what, 7... 8 months? You sure as hell didn't just find out." He laughs bitterly and I can feel some of my own tears slipping at his cold and hurt tone. "I'm 8 months, almost 9." She confirms gently, as if the fact wouldn't make things worse and Ricky wipes at his face aggressively. "Cool. So you knew at the wedding then? Nice. Real nice. Congratulations. Come on Nini." He pulls on my arm and suddenly he's walking us down the driveway and onto the sidewalk, not stopping as Lynne calls after us. He seems like he's in a daze, not thinking straight, and his grip is almost bruising, I shake my arm, trying to get him to let go. "Ricky you're hurting me." I say and he drops my arm, and halting his walking. "Fuck sorry. I'm sorry." He says and I shake my head, pressing my hand to his back. "It's okay babe I-" He cuts me off by clapping this hands. "So are you up for ice cream?" I open my mouth in shock and shake my head. "No? Alright how about milkshakes? My dad found this-" I stop Ricky from talking by stepping in front of him, taking ahold of both of his wrists. "Ricky, stop. Talk to me." I watch as he swallows hard, but he plasters a fake smile on his face. "Nins. I'm all good." He says, his fake tone almost convincing enough but I shake my head. "Ricky come on. You're not. I can see it. Talk to me, please." I say and I'm pleased when my words start to chip away at his facade, his eyes glazing with emotion as he looks away. "I'm all good. I should've expected this to be honest. She's a mess." He shrugs. "So I'm totally good and up for food." He finishes, false happiness in his voice. The way he speaks scares me, not an ounce of genuine emotion. I take a step towards him and cup his cheek gently, getting him to turn and meet my eyes. I run my thumb under his eye and up to his temple, and his eyes close at the sensation. I thread my fingers through the back of his curls, before tracing small circles on the base of his neck and bringing my hand back to his cheek. It's all it takes before I see the first tear run down his face and I'm quick to wipe it away, knowing that I fully cracked through his armor. He's quiet and breathing deeply, but it's interrupted by the sound of clicking shoes. I look past Ricky to see Lynne walking towards us, concern etched on her face. I place both of my hands on Ricky's shoulders, encouraging him not to turn around. "Please leave him alone." I plead quietly, when she gets close enough, not a bit of earlier's aggression in my voice. Lynne holds her stomach and I look up to Ricky to see him squeezing his eyes shut. "Ricky baby, I know I screwed up. Again. But I want... I want you to be in his life." She says and a few more tears slip down Ricky's face. "I'm not even a part of yours." He whispers out quietly, and at those words, my vision blurs again. "We'll see you later." I say before leading Ricky away, resting my head on his shoulder and rubbing his back gently.