A light || Ricky and Nini

Chapter 40

Nini POV

The next morning, my moms suggested that Ricky and I went out to for breakfast at our local coffee shop. It was a welcomed suggestion after the night that he had and getting out together is always a good thing. A quiet Sunday morning at a coffee shop with Ricky sounded like a great way to spend a day. When we got to the coffee shop, Ricky took my hand and we sat together in the same booth. The booth faced the window and we stared out in a happy daze. His arm wraps around me and he kisses my cheek. "I hope I didn't make you lose too much sleep Nins." He says into my ear. I smile up at him. "I fell right back to sleep, and I was more comfortable knowing you were okay so there's literally nothing to apologize for." I tell him, poking his cheek and earning a laugh. He pulls me closer into his side. "Oh! It's Gina!" I say as I look out the window. She's standing on the sidewalk texting someone. "I'll be right back babe." I say to him. He smiles his signature smile and lets me go as I get out of the booth and walk outside. "Hey girlie!" I say catching her attention. She turns and smiles at me "Aye good morning Nini." She says, throwing her arms around me. "How are you?" I ask her, smiling. "I'm super good, EJ and I are meeting up today." She whispers the last part in an excited tone. "GINA." I say in excitement and I shake her shoulders. She laughs and beams at me. "I know, I know. Like we never confirmed being a thing, we just always kept almost-kissing each other and like brushing hands. There were a few times he'd reach for my hand but we never talked about what it meant and he'd let me lean on his chest BUT WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?" She rushes out excitedly. "Wait. You two never talked about being a thing that day after you guys almost kissed?" I ask confused. "No, we stood there awkwardly and he asked if we could walk to lunch together." I start to giggle and she joins in. "This is amazing. Text me after you two meet up." I tell her. "I will! How are you and Ricky?" I smile and squeeze her hand. "SO GOOD. I mean, he's been really confiding in me with everything that's happening with his parents and it feels good to know he trusts me." Gina nods and instinctively I look into the coffee shop. What I see though, stops me from talking and Gina turns to see what I'm looking at. "I'm sorry, but what the fuck?" She asks. Ricky is seated at our booth and a gorgeous girl is seated next to him, one hand on his shoulder another on his hand. Ricky is nodding and smiling and they seem deep in a conversation. "Nini-" Gina starts. "No it's fine." I say. I'm not threatened, I'm not jealous at all. I'm completely fine. "Nini, girl, I hate to tell you, but you don't look fine. Do you want to go for a walk?" Gina says. Emotions are surging through me and I'm trying to remain rational. Ricky loves me, he loves us. Not that beautiful girl sitting next to him with her hand on his body. He can talk to other girls! Except that isn't what is bothering me. The familiarity in their facial expressions is getting to me. The way he looks at her as if she's his number one confidant. I'm fine though. "You know what? I'm gonna go in there and-" Gina is stalking over towards the door and I pull her arm back. "No, it's fine. I think I'm just going to go home. I don't want to make him feel like I'm possessive or toxic or whatever. I just kinda want to go home and let myself feel all this and then he and I will be fine." Gina looks unsure. "What are you going to tell him?" I think for a second. "Just that I had to help you with something." Gina breathes out. "Okay. You get home and I'm going to go meet with EJ. I'll shoot Ricky a text on the way and just say that I needed your help." I nod and I glance one more time at the girl and Ricky still heavily in their discussion. "Love you." I say to Gina, and I'm on my way home.

I get home and walk into my room, closing my door and sitting in my swing. My moms left and I have the place to myself. I let myself cry just for a few minutes. I know I'm his best friend and his girlfriend, I know that he loves me and that we're meant for each other but jealousy and sadness rage through me and I have to let myself feel them or else I'll explode. I think about every kiss that Ricky and I have shared. Every single one filled with passion and love. That can't be faked. And I know it isn't. But that doesn't mean that he's not attracted to that girl in the coffee shop. That doesn't mean that they didn't make out this summer when Ricky was hanging out with "a few girls." I can tell by their conversation that they know each other well and jealousy continues to surge through my body. It's not fair for me to feel this, I dated EJ and Ricky had to see it. But I still feel like my heart has been shattered for some reason. I continue to cry silently. I vowed to myself a while back that I wouldn't let this boy break my heart again. He hasn't even done anything and I still feel hurt, which just shows me how much pain love can be.

I pick up my phone for the first time since I left the coffee shop. About 15 texts and 2 missed calls from Ricky attract my attention. I just close my eyes and allow a few more tears to fall. When I open my eyes I see another text come across my screen. "I'll be over in 5. I don't buy Gina's story. Front door better be open." I close my eyes again, not bothering to respond and I let myself continue to cry until I hear my front door open. I frantically wipe my eyes and try to get rid of my splotchy face but I think that I've only made it worse. I hear a tap on the door and a soft voice. "Nini?" I hear. I did NOT want drama today, and here I go, causing drama. Damn, it's fun to be a girl sometimes.