A light || Ricky and Nini

Chapter 183

Ricky POV

My heart feels sore. Like it was already at its breaking point, and I just pushed it over. But I also feel like I'm in a state of disbelief. "This might be too soon..." Nini interrupts my thoughts and I wait for her to finish her sentence. "But remember when we said that the universe had one thing right.... and it was not giving you a younger sibling?" I can't help but let out a laugh as she clutches onto my body a little more as we continue to walk down the sidewalk. "Fuck." I say out of disbelief and Nini gives me a little smile before pressing her lips to my shoulder gently. "Where are we going?" I ask her and she shrugs, looking over my face carefully. "I was hoping you'd have that plan." I smile and squeeze her hand. "Maybe home? I should talk to my dad." Nini nods and she pulls on my arm a little, this time leading us with purpose.

The second I open my front door, I'm met with my dad walking towards me and Nini quickly. He doesn't say anything, just wraps me in a tight hug and I let out a shuddery breath, hugging him back. There are a few seconds of silence before I speak. "She's gonna have another kid. Mom's having another son soon. She can barely handle her own." I laugh sarcastically as the tears start to slip again and I feel Nini's hand on my back, rubbing gently as she hears the break in my voice. "I heard. She called after you two parted ways. I'm sorry bud. I'm so sorry that this shitty situation keeps affecting you." I shrug, pulling back and trying to ignore the tears that are falling faster. "It is what it is. She'll be who she wants to be and I can't change that." My voice breaks again and Nini pulls on my arm, wrapping her small body around my right side. I hold onto her arms. "Lemme know what I can do Rick." My dad looks at me sympathetically and I wave one of my hands, shaking my head. "No, there's nothing you can do." I say quietly and my dad nods. "Why don't you two go upstairs, I'm gonna call Lynne, I think she and I have a few things to discuss." I bite my lip, wiping at my tear-stained face. I nod though, intertwining my fingers with Nini's and accepting the escape. "Alright I'll see you in a bit." I say and Nini rubs her thumb against my skin, giving my dad a small wave.

"Come here." Nini whispers the second the door to my room closes and I walk into her arms willingly, holding her like she's going to disappear. "Don't let go." I say and she breathes out. "I wasn't going to. I'm staying right here as long as you need me." She tells me carefully and I press myself closer to her, resting my head in the crook of her neck. "Every part of me wants to hate her." I say into Nini's skin and she rubs my neck. "You have every right to." She reminds me and I shake my head. "I can't. She's carrying my half brother and-" Nini cuts me off because I don't even realize I'm pulling away in anger. Her hands grab at my wrists and she holds them loosely. "Don't feel how you're supposed to. Feel what you want to Ricky. That's exactly what you told me." She tells me and I meet her intense eyes. "I-" I'm about to answer when I hear my dad yelling downstairs. I squeeze my eyes shut as the memories of being a kid come rushing back, the yelling feeling like an extension of me. "I'm right here." Nini reminds me quietly and she guides me over to my bed, crawling close to me and holding me near her body. The yelling my dad's doing remains loud though and I rock my body back and forth as I fight the memories of the familiar situation. It's not a panic attack, but it's turning into one as Nini rubs my back and encourages me to focus on anything but my dad's voice. I feel her small hands cover my ears and even though it doesn't do much, I open my eyes to meet hers, recognizing the pleading expression she's holding. "You're not alone." She reminds me, her voice breaking slightly. I nod and close my eyes and before I know it, the yelling fades away in both reality and my mind. I breathe out in relief and rub at my eyes.

Nini doesn't pull away from me, and that's almost just as relieving as dodging a panic attack. I only break away from her embrace slightly though when I hear my phone buzzing from inside my pocket. Nini kisses my shoulder as I pull it out and I notice it's an unknown number so I hit the decline button and return to holding Nini. Only a quick moment passes though before the same number calls again. I see Nini's eyes furrow and I pick up the phone carefully.