Mourning Skies

Ashamed // Proud

I'd like to start out by saying
I'm sorry for the years of silence
My voice box seems to have
Faded with the violence

I swallow my pride, I try
I can't help but scream and cry

Because your voice still lingers
In the widest of space
Where I stand alone
With a bag over my face

It's because you're ashamed
It always stays the same

But it's no matter I'll just
Start stitching up my wounds
Seal them with a stamp of oil
That poured over your head

That would never meet my own

Because I never received
Your love or your grace
You looked down on me
Like some kind of disgrace

Now I'm pleading for answers
To why you shut me out
Once you slammed your door
You're ears turned inside out

You could only hear your own mind
And it whispered to your heart
Down through bones and nerves
To spark the silence and start
I'm sorry for what I've ever done
Imm sorry for what I've become

I know it's been so long
Since we've even said a word

Because each one is loaded
With a double meaning
Like a double edged sword
Leaving both of us bleeding

Now I scramble to find
Sanity left in my mind
But the river is dry
I can't even cry
The tears I once shed
Turned to wishes I was dead

I could be better for you
I could've been a better daughter
But it seems my colors were out of control
You committed manslaughter

You took a knife to my heart
Twisted it deep in my soul

Left it there to keep my alive
Keeping the colors inside
But I'm a walking ghost
Deader than most

But my peaceful demeanor
Gave way to my color
And to mask me again
I would never recover

I'll bleed my true colors
And these you will never hide
Now that my shell is shattered and gone
I can do no more than show my pride