Mourning Skies

Forgotten

I try my hardest
Not to blame them

After all, I'm under their roof
In their family
I'm their child

But as bills flew
In a violent slew
Whirlwinds of needs
To care for themselves
And the two little souls
They created from between themselves
I remember them chuckling
At a family reunion
When I was ten
That I could practically live on my own

And maybe I already was

But no matter the independence
I was either handed willingly
Or possibly already possessed
The space that's ebbed and grown
Between us with time
Has seeped into my own being
Creating a black hole within myself

You punished me for hiding in my room
You said I was being antisocial
What does antisocial have to do
With the crippling anxiety
Of being in a house
Never meant to be a home?
To do with a child that cannot speak
Tape around my mouth
And a rope around my neck
Maybe that's why I can't speak
Why I've tied my tongue time after time
After every nervous stare
From the person who promised to always be here

And as I am consumed
By the black hole inside of me
I am no longer your worry
No longer a burden to muddle on
Not even a child
Or a ghost of what they were
I'm just what you seem to
Have forgotten