Stephen Mulhern one shots

Thoughts and help

Based off of something i read,TW depression,thoughs of suicide 

When Stephen woke up that morning,Stephen knew he was going to do it.Now,as he trudged through the town with nothing but his phone,he wasn't so convinced anymore.

Though Stephen did know one thing,he was depressed and suicidal,he wasn't dumb enough to know that normal people didn't think like he does,What he planned last night made an obvious show of that.

He couldn't do it even though he walked to the Thames river and planned to jump off,like he was supposed to do,he walked slowly away not minding where he was going.

Stephen was numb and paid attention to nothing,not the loud cars or people yelling,he just didn't listen,he never wanted to listen again.

Tears stung to his eyes as he walked for no reason,the cold air,made him shiver a little but he didn't care,well he did pull the hood of his jacket up.

He slowly made his way to the park bench that he had seen so he could gather his thoughts.He slowly sat down chuckling,wiping the tears from his eyes.

Stephen didn't know how bad everything got,to the point of taking his own life was the better thing to do.

He tried to steady his breathing,he didn't know why,he didn't want to be here anymore.H e flinched when his phone made a dinging sound.Not expecting it to,he pulled his phone out.

There were some missing calls from his parents but they gave up a while ago. Apparently claiming something is wrong with him,which there is.Though when he checked his phone it was actually Dec.

Are you okay?Where are you? 

Stephen wondered if his parents called.Who knows. Stephen replied.

I'm fine

Stephen went to put his phone back in his pocket,but it pinged again.

That's not what i asked.

Stephen rolled his eyes,turned his phone off and shoved his phone back in his pocket.Then dropped his head in his hands with a pitiful sigh.

He knew deep down that people cared for him,but he was struck in a pit of self-hatred haze.He wondered if he should have gone through with it.he knew people will feel guilty,but will move on at some point.

Ant and Dec would find a new friend,David wouldn't care,the girls will cry for a little bit but move on,Simon would be glad for one less person to pay,everyone will fine with out him.

Stephen heard footsteps,but paid no attention to it,just as he was about to get up and go to the bridge again,He heard the two very familiar voices making their way toward him.

He stilled when he felt someone sit beside him and the other stood in front of him.
"Going to look at us Stevie"Ant asked.Slowly,Stephen looked up"H-hey guys"He said quietly

Stephen winched,looking around to see if he could escape.The boy's face's softened when they saw his red eyes.

"Wanna tell why you're sitting on a bench at one in the morning,ignoring us"Dec questioned.
"I don't know"Stephen replied 

The boy's looked around and saw a dude with a hot dog cart serving hot dogs"You hungry"Dec asked,Stephen shook his head no and the boys respected that,not wanting to push or anything.

"Talk to us Stevie"Ant said to the skinny man

Stephen waited a minute and looked at them"I went to the bridge above the Thames"He admitted quietly.

The boys heart skipped a beat "Why"

Stephen gave them this unreadable look

Ant stuttered out"No,we mean why would you want to do that?"His eyes flickered over Stephen and waited for an answer. 

"I'm not sure,i don't understand why i think like that" Stephen answered truthfully, his voice shaking.

Dec tried"What do you think about"worried for his friend,Stephen looked at them"That,i am not good enough,i'm a bad person,that i don't know why i am here"He answered truthfully

Stephen was shaking a lot as he told them what he never planned to tell anyone.

The boy's flinched a little"So we can help you,get someone to help  you with these feelings"Dec said nervously 

Stephen glared at m crossing his arms"No i am fine and i don't need any hep i am not sick and i sure as hell don't need a doctor to tell me that i am depressed and suicidal"He yelled at them

Dec crossed his arms and looked sternly at him"No,you need a doctor so they can help,give you meds that will help you"

"Maybe i don't want to!"Stephen shot back

"I don't care you need help"Dec yelled

They all fell silent.Ant put his hand on Stephen shoulder"Stephen please we will be there with you till the end,were not leaving because we don't want to lose you,we need you,i need you so please"Ant begged

Stephen had tears in his eyes again the same night."Why?"he whispered, tears rolling down his cheeks.

Ant and Dec crouched in front of him"Why because we love you"Dec said quietly

"I love you guys too"Stephen breathed out.The boys took their opportunity to pull him into a tight hug.

Stephen was sure as hell was not going anyway if they had anything to do with it.