As the title suggests this a very, very naughty joke book so if you are easily offended... then this collection of jokes is not for you. Some are clean but the majority are not but the only reason they are in this book is because, rightly or wrongly...
An Irishman is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes upon a preacher baptising people in the river near the city of Dublin in the Republic of Ireland.
He proceeds to walk into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, whereupon he asks the drunk,
"Are you ready to find Jesus?"
The drunk shouts, "Yes, oi am."
So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. He pulls him up and asks the drunk, "Brother have you found Jesus?"
The drunk replies, "No, oi haven't found Jesus."
The preacher, shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again for a little longer.
He again pulls him out of the water and asks again, "Have you found Jesus me brother?"
The drunk again answers, "No, oi I haven't found Jesus."
By this time the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the drunk in the water again, but this time holds him down for about 30 seconds, and when he begins kicking his arms and legs he pulls him up. The preacher again asks the drunk, "For the love of God have you found Jesus?" . . . . . . (✍🏽 okay, you could see it coming, couldn't you? So here it is)
The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his breath and says to the preacher, "Are you sure dis is where he fell in?"
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Two men were sitting in a pub in Cork, Ireland watching the Tour de France on TV.
Seamus shook his head and asked, "Whoi do they do that?"
"Do what?" Mick answered.
"Go on them boikes for moiles and moiles, up and down t'e hills, round t'e bends. Day after day, week after week. No matter if it's oicy, rainin', snowin', hailin'...... Why would they torture themselves like that?"
"Tis all for the prestige and the money," replied Mick, "You know the winner gets about a half a million Euros?
"Yeah, I understand that," said Seamus, "but why do all the others do it?"
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