Makeup S.M.

Chapter Ninty Seven

I lay awake in my bed looking around the hospital room. I wish she could be next to me. Right by my side holding my hand to tell me everything will be alright, spending time with our kids, these could very well be my final hours. Everything about this hospital makes me uncomfortable. Once every forty five minutes a nurse walks in and makes me pee in a cup, which I can't do alone. The bed is uncomfortable but I can't be any other way, I have such a big room and all to myself. All night, all day, all afternoon I'll wait for her to come back in. I don't care if it's three seconds I wanna see her, her soft brown eyes her long brown hair, her rosy cheeks, her perfect plump pink lips.

"M. Mendes," a nurse opens the door walking in, I sigh as I see no one behind her. "Still waiting?" She starts grabbing things from around the room.

"I know she won't come," I shrug eating as she grabs the cup.

"Don't loose hope yet," she moves the sheets of my bed and lifts my strange uncomfortable hospital dress and fixing everything else for me before she covers me again waiting. She's a very nice person and she come in quite often just to talk to me. "So how about your kids?" She smiles.

"I can't wait to see them," I smile until I realize that she wants them, she wants to keep them full time. "I have three boys and my one little girl," I smile.

"At nineteen?" She breaths. "At nineteen I still didn't have a boyfriend," she teases a little and I smile finding myself laughing with her. "Anyway," she motions for me to continue.

"My little boys are calm they only cry when they're hungry or want someone to hold them," I explain making her awe. "But my little girl," I breath. "She cries only when she's hungry and she eats a lot," I nod. "And when she cries the boys cry too," I shake my head.

"So your wife is taking care of em." She nods. "Maybe that's why she won't come to visit," she shrugs trying to bring the look of hope back to my eyes.

"I don't think so," I look down hearing a soft knock at the door.

"You've gotta fill that cup by the time I get back," she points.

"Wait," I call, she opens the door letting whoever was at the door in. "It's not right," I shake my head at the cup. She rolls her eyes moving the blankets and my hospital gown putting it on properly. It's not something that is very comfortable, or anything you'd like to happen regularly but it does for me. She fixes everything back up and points to the side of my bed.

"Hi," she smiles holding Adam on her lap.

"Hi, what are you doing here?" I give her a look of pure surprise but happiness washes the look away.

"Adam wanted to see you," she looks down at him. She plays with his fingers, reminding me so much of when she was in the hospital, she looks at the child and then at me. "I guess all he really needed was to see you," she stands and makes her way towards the door. The nurse sitting next to me hits my arm and points at her and the my bedsheets. I sigh feeling like an idiot for even considering this. The nurse walks out and gives me a stern look.

"Reese?" I sigh trying to stop her from leaving.

"Yeah?" She turns to me looking mainly at the ground.

"Can you come help me?" I close my eyes unable to look at her without feeling pain.

"Sure," she nods a little taking me by surprise. She sets Adam in the chair she was sitting in and she looks at me. "What do you need?" She gives me a weak smile, almost a smile of sympathy.

"Can you," I pause unsure of how to say it. "Move the sheets?" I question, I'm too weak to do it myself and even if I could I'd be in trouble. She looks at the cup and the at me.

"You want me to do this?" She smiles a little trying her best not to show me.

"Yeah, um, yes, please," I say awkwardly. She moves the cup and shutting the lid on it setting it aside as she wipes everything off of me gently before she puts the sheets back.

"There," she nods her voice soft, barely a whisper sounding as if she were gonna brake down.

"Hi baby," I wave at Adam who waves as well, moving his face as if trying to smile back at me. "Soon baby boy I promise," I nod at him.

"Alright well, I guess that's it," she shrugs moving Adam back onto her hip. "See you in court," she shrugs walking off.

"Wait," I call but she doesn't listen she just keeps walking. "I love you," I look down.

"How'd it go?" The nurse walks back in with a smile.

"She did it," I shrug.

"She didn't stay though," she wraps her arms gently around me. "She was only here like ten minutes," she sighs trying to comfort me. "Well, you have more visitors, I'll take this and I'll let them in, I'll talk to you later," she walks off waving gently at me to which I respond with a smile.

"Hi mom," I smile.

"Why'd you do this to yourself?" She huffs.

"I didn't do it on purpose I promise," now every time I promise something I feel like a failure. I promised Reese I'd be home soon, that I'd be careful, that I wouldn't take too long but here I am on a hospital bed because I couldn't keep a simple promise.

"Where's Reese?" My dad looks in confusion. My mom and my dad knew Reese as my saviour, my rock, my home, my shelter almost. Everything that I've accomplished is because of her. She's done so much for me and I love her dearly and I thought she felt the same way.

"She's not here," I shake my head.

"Why not?" They give me strange looks.

"She," I swallow slowly. "She wants a divorce," I pull out her ring. I keep it close to me always knowing I won't get to see her often or quite possibly at all.

"Awe baby," my mom hugs me and I brake into tears. It's a mixture of the drugs and honest emotional pain.

"I thought she loved me," I cry against my moms shoulder. I can feel something at the back of my throats and I pull away from my mothers embrace throwing up some blood in the cardboard box.

"Oh, Shawn," my dad sighs touching my shoulder gently as to not hurt me.

"What?" I cough up some more before looking to them.

"This is just horrific," they sigh a little more. "It's something no parent ever wants to see," he explains. I understand what they mean having kids makes everything different, the way you think, the things you do, the way you act. Just watching my parents' pain makes my own ten times worse.

"I didn't mean to," I look down feeling solely guilty for everything that's happened.

"It's not your fault," they smile gently at me. "You weren't trying to," my mom looks down to my neck but my dads focus remains on my eyes.

"The seatbelt," I say quietly to my mom. "It cut me a little," I look to the ground.

"I'm glad you're ok," is all she manages to say to me.

"Me too," I sigh. "I don't know what I would do without my family," I kiss my moms cheek and my dad hugs me softly.