𝕭𝕿𝕾 𝕴𝖒𝖆𝖌𝖎𝖓𝖊𝖘

Yoongi - Without Me Part 2

Yoongi's pov

It's been a few months since Y/n stopped talking to us. Or more accurately me. She still talks to the guys. Mostly Jimin. I don't know why but that bothers me. Why is she so close with him? I've been her friend since childhood not him. Am I jealous? If that's what it is I have no right to be. She's not mine.

"Yoongi! Hurry up I'm hungry." I'm snapped out of my thoughts by Mina and I rush to walk next to her again. Why am I even thinking about this right now? It's dinner time and Mina needs to eat.

We get to a restaurant and we're seated by a waiter. Mina orders wine to drink and I just get water for myself. Y/n says it's important to stay hydrated. I pause as I realized I thought about Y/n again. Why is she stuck in my head?

To distract myself I looked at Mina while she was on her phone. I normally could stare at her for hours and think she was the prettiest thing in the world. But she looks different now. She has too much makeup on and her hair is bleached blond making it a bit wiry looking. She's wearing gaudy jewelry and her clothes are trying to show off everything.

Y/n is much different. She hardly wears makeup but she has a natural beauty so she doesn't need it anyways. Y/n's hair is always soft when I feel it even with it being died different colors. When she wears jewelry it's simple and nice looking and she never wears what Mina is wearing now.

I tear my eyes away from Mina. I keep comparing her to Y/n. Mina is no longer beautiful to me. But I don't see how. I love her. Don't I?

"I'll be right back." I say as I start to get up.

"Whatever." She doesn't even look at me as continues to look at her phone. I make my way to the bathroom and splash a bit of water on my face before looking at myself in the mirror.

"What is going on with you Min Yoongi?" I say to my reflection. It doesn't reply. I sigh and dry my hands. I make my way back to the table but stop when I see Mina on the phone.

"Don't worry babe. Of course I'll get the money. Yoongi's always been wrapped around my little finger. He can never say 'no' to me." I see her smirk and I realize it's all been a lie. Mina never wanted me. Not even before.

She hangs up the phone as I stand by the table. I pull out my wallet and place a few bills in front of her. "What's this?" She asks.

"That should cover the drinks. And the rest is for you. Apparently you need it." I turn and start to walk away.

"Yoongi? Where are you going?"

"Away from you. Don't call me again." And I leave the restaurant. I make my way back to the dorms and collapse onto the couch. No but me and Jimin are home right now.

"Hyung? What are you doing back? I thought you were with your girlfriend." Jimin said. He emphasized 'girlfriend'. I knew he didn't like Mina. He never said it outright but I could tell with the way he sounded when he talked about her. I see know there was a reason behind it.

"I was but she's not my girlfriend." I said.

"Why not? I thought you loved her."

"I thought so too. But I don't feel the same anymore. Especially since I found out she was just using me."

"Oh you can use people but you don't like people using you?"

"What did you say?" I glared at him.

"You heard me." He glared back.

For some reason I couldn't get mad at him for being disrespectful. There was something about what he said. "Whatever. I'm gonna go call Y/n." I started to get up.

"Why? So you can hurt her more?" His voice was angry but I focused on his words.

"What? What do you mean hurt her?" His mouth formed a thin line and he looked away. "Jimin what do you mean?"

"I wasn't supposed to say that. But I couldn't keep saying nothing." He looked at me again. "You're so caught up in that gold digging user that you didn't notice you were using Y/n. While you're there pining over that girl she's supporting you with a broken heart."

"What are you talking about?"

"She loves you, you idiot!"

Y/n loves me? "But she never said anything."

"Of course not. She's too nice and she loves you too much. She wants you to be happy even if it's not with her."

A memory floated up in my mind.

A few years ago

I was getting ready to go to lunch with Y/n. She said she was treating me because I've been working so well. She also said she wanted to take everyone for dinner because everyone's done a good job. I hear voices as I go down the hall. It was Y/n and Jimin.

"Then why do you do it? Why do you put so much care in someone who does it for another person?" I heard Jimin say. I stopped when I heard what Y/n said.

She sighed. "I don't know really. I love him so much and I just want him to be happy. Even if it's not with me."

I go down the hall and they stop talking and I pretend I didn't hear anything. I wondered who she was talking about. For second I wondered if she was talking about me but that's crazy. Y/n doesn't have feelings like that for me.

But she does. And I had no idea. Then I think about when I stayed at her house. I won't deny that I was feeling something for her then. I didn't know what it was and I had blindly acted on it when we were drunk. And I kept doing small things after that.

I can't believe what I did. "I slept with her." I muttered.

"You what?"

"When we celebrated the album release. Then I stayed with her and I held her hand and kissed her cheek." I was mainly talking to myself but also to Jimin who was looking more and more angry by the second. I couldn't blame him. I was getting angry at myself as well.

"You did that and still went back to Mina? After everything Y/n's done for you? You told me yourself you wouldn't be where you are without her."

"I wouldn't. She encouraged me to audition for Bighit. She helped me ignore the people who said I wasn't good enough."

Why couldn't I see it before? That's why she seemed strange back then. Back when I told her I was going back to Mina.

A few months ago

I walked into Y/n's house so I could get my stuff. Mina wanted me back and I accepted. I have to move back into the dorm so she won't think I'm feeling anything for Y/n. Even though I kind of do.

I see her sitting on the couch and she looked st me. "Y/n I-" I started but she cut me off.

"I know. You're with Mina again. I've seen the pictures. And now you're going back to the dorms so she doesn't get the wrong idea about us."

I sighed relieved. "I'm glad you understand."

She had a small smile on her face. "Yeah. I totally understand. We were fun while we lasted right?"

"Yeah we were. Thanks for being there for me Y/n."

"Of course. What are friends for?"

What are friends for?

I didn't see it then. I didn't hear it. Her heartbreak. "Jimin. I messed up bad. I don't know what to do."

"I think you should listen to her latest song. Once you hear it try to fix it." He left the room then. I instantly pulled out my phone and looked up her song. Without Me. (a/n in the story you wrote and sung Without Me.) As I listened to the words things clicked in my mind.

Found you when your heart was broke
I filled your cup until it overflowed
Took it so far to keep you close
I was afraid to leave you on your own

I always called her when I was heartbroken over Mina. Y/n gave me so much affection and I didn't even realize.

I said I'd catch you if you fall
And if they laugh, then fuck 'em all
And then I got you off your knees
Put you right back on your feet
Just so you could take advantage of me

Y/n no. I didn't mean to.

Tell me, how's it feel sittin' up there?
Feelin' so high, but too far away to hold me
You know I'm the one who put you up there
Name in the sky, does it ever get lonely?
Thinking you could live without me
Thinking you could live without me
Baby, I'm the one who put you up there
I don't know why
Thinking you could live without me
Live without me
Baby, I'm the one who put you up there
I don't know why

Y/n is the one who put me where I am. Without her I wouldn't have been able to follow my dream. Our dream.

Gave love 'bout a hundred tries
Just running from the demons in your mind
Then I took yours and made 'em mine
I didn't notice 'cause my love was blind

I never paid attention to how much she gave me. She took care of me when she should have taken care of herself.

You don't have to say just what you did
I already know
I had to go and find out from them
So tell me, how's it feel?

Awful. Everything feels terrible without her. I realize that now. I got up and ran to the car. I let her song play over and over as I raced to her house. I had to knock because I gave her key back. I practically pounded on the door in my rush to see her.

"Alright! Alright! Hold your horses!" I heard her annoyed voice. The door opened. "Wha- Yoongi?" Her voice went quieter when she said my name. I wasted no time in pulling her to me and kissing her. She tensed for a second but relaxed. When I pulled away she blinked for a second looking a little dazed.

"What was that for?" She asked.

"I can't live without you."

"What?"

"I can't. I don't even know why I thought I could. I need you in my life Y/n. Not just as a friend. I need to hold you and kiss you like I did before."

Her cheeks turned redder with every word I said. "What about Mina? You love her."

I shook my head. "Forget about Mina. She's nothing to me now. I love you. Do you still love me?"

She smiled. "Of course I do. I can never not love you Yoongs." I smiled and kissed her again. "But how did you know how I felt?"

"Jimin told me."

She widened her eyes in shock but then quickly narrowed them. "Oh that jamless boy is so gonna get it."

"Don't be mad at Jimin. I'm glad he told me."

"Why?"

"So I can keep doing this." I leaned forward and kissed her again. I definitely have to help Jimin find some jams to repay him for helping me realize how much I love Y/n.