Bucky Barnes Imagines

I'm Fine - B.B.

He left. Just a note. That's all you got.

Y/n,
I'm so sorry. I can't be your boyfriend anymore.
~ JBB

You honestly cannot believe it. You two were so close. You helped him out so much and it seems that it's all gone to waste. Maybe you should've told him that you love him and how much meant to you. How much he was wanted in your life. Though he might not know it, how much he helped you out by just being around and there.

You've cried for over three hours after finding all his things gone except his favorite hoodie. Which you're holding onto for dear life like it might be the only thing keeping you from going under the water. It's all you have left of him. Your Bucky is gone.

You protected him first.

~Flashback~

You watched your dad start saying those words. Bucky pleaded and screamed no. A man was begging your father for his life. He didn't want to be controlled no more. He wanted to be left alone.

A bullet hit the back of your father's head and he fell to the ground before the last word could be spoken. A tear streamed down your face as you watched the blood coming out of your father's head and you could see his brains.

"Come on before this ship goes capsize," you said lowering your weapon that you just fired.

He just looked at you with wide eyes. You started leaving and you motioned the man to follow you. You looked behind you and he was staring at the dead body.

"I don't have all day for this shit," you yelled.

Bucky quickly came over and you led the way.

~<>~

You screamed until it felt like sand made up your throat. You started throwing things against the wall wondering what you did wrong. Should you have saved him? Duh. Should you have kissed him when he came back from his first mission? You don't know. You don't know anymore. You really don't.

Your shared bedroom looked like someone ransack it and you were in the middle of the room all numb. At the same time, you felt everything. So many emotions. They all just made you numb. You've had breakups before but none that hurt you so much like this did.

You love his smile. The way his eyes crinkled when he laughed at a stupid joke you told and yet he found it to be the funniest thing ever. The way he would blush when you told him he had oceanic eyes that you could get lost in. You love his dynamic between him and Sam. You love how he actually loves Sam like a brother even when he tells him he hates him. You love how Bucky would drop anything just to make sure Steve doesn't do anything stupid. And god you love that metal arm of his. You love Bucky so much it hurts. It feels like your whole world is torn apart. Like there's no point to living in this world if you don't have him.

You looked up at the ceiling and wonder what the hell you did wrong. Maybe it was cause you couldn't cook. Maybe it was the mess you left in the bathroom every morning. Maybe you weren't skinny enough for him even though you are perfectly healthy. Maybe it was the long missions. Maybe he couldn't handle it. Maybe you weren't good enough for that man with the metal arm.

Your phone buzzed and you picked it out of the rumble. You looked at the screen and it's just Wanda. You're disappointed but you answer.

"Hey," You said clearing your throat.

"Hey, just checking in on you. How are you?"

"I'm fine," you said quietly as the tears streamed down your cheeks.