Lights Out • 1 • Formula One ✔️

Chapter 103

Usually, I'm excited for tomorrows, especially when the tomorrow consists of getting into my formula one car and racing at speeds unimaginable to the majority. The adrenaline that courses through my veins is like a drug - I can never get enough of it, or so I thought...

I went to bed dreading tomorrow and woke up dreading the day ahead. Despite Mexico being one of my favourite races to watch (and also one of my favourites to drive around), the last thing I wanted to do was get in car. Yesterday's threats really threw me off my game and it's hard to look past them. Emanuel sent me texts for the entire morning just telling me to ignore them, and that everything would be fine. A part of me wanted to believe him, but the panicked side of me won. A sick feeling arose in my stomach every time I thought about sitting in the cockpit of my car. I don't want to race.

"Are you sure you're alright, Lys?" Charles asked, giving my hand a small squeeze after we had shown our passes to the guards. "You're quieter than usual."

"Fine," I mumbled in reply. I kept my gaze ahead but saw Charles looking at me out of the corner of my eye. He still doesn't know about the panic attacks I had last night because I didn't want to worry him. If I told him about them, he'd want to know the reasons why and I'll have a much harder time shutting him down than I did with Max last night. Charles would either agree with me and not want me to race, or he'd take Emanuel's side and tell me not to worry.

"Hey." Charles stopped and placed both hands on my shoulder. "You can talk to me about anything, you know. If there's something bothering you-"

"I'm good, Charles." I forced the corners of my lips upwards into a smile as I looked into his eyes.

He raised both eyebrows and dropped his hands to the dip in my waist. "Promise?"

"Promise." When I noticed that he didn't look too convinced, I placed my hands against his chest and pressed my lips lightly against his. There were almost definitely going to be cameras catching this moment but I didn't really care. The team can't exactly drop me as Charles isn't my rival at this point in the season and I've already got my seat secured for next season. Max is the only person who might hurt from this as Lando seems quite happy with his new girl; I'm not worrying about him anymore. He was so keen to show me that he would happily go out with his ex, so it's not a crime to show him that I'm content with the person I'm with.

A wide smile was plastered on Charles's face when I pulled away. "You just kissed me in public."

"No, really?" I sarcastically replied, before going onto my tiptoes and kissing him again. "Oops."

"Why?"

"It stopped you asking if I was alright, didn't it?" I laced our fingers together and leaned against his arm. "Plus, I like you, and I kiss the people I like."

"I like you, too," Charles said, "a lot, actually."

"Then believe me when I tell you I'm fine, okay?"

"But-"

I sighed. "I'm fine." I added extra emphasis on 'fine' just to try and get my point across. This boy cared to much and at times where I'd rather not share my problems, it can get rather tiresome. "Now, good luck today. I'll see you later."

"Yeah." He squeezed my hand a final time before letting go as we arrived at the Sauber centre. "Good luck, as well. I know you don't need it as much as me."

"Thanks, Charlo. I could do with a bit of luck." I waved at him as he jogged up the ramp to the Sauber centre. He blew me a kiss back as he walked into the building and then went out of sight.

It set in that I had to head to Force India now. My mind could no longer focus on Charles and instead chose to focus back on the threats. My stomach twisted uncomfortably as I neared the pink building. It was a lot busier than it had been last night which didn't ease any of my nerves. My eyes could've glanced over the culprit and I wouldn't have even known it which is an uneasy thought.