trying to feel better

day 233

03.14.21
10:35 pm

Today was a really good day.

Lately me and E have been getting closer. And today was one of those days where we seemed very couple like. So obviously we go to the same church and this morning he came in and said hey mamas. Which he's been saying lately. And when he hugged me I told him he smelled good and I swear I heard him say thanks babe.

Then when it was over I went to leave but wanted to invite E out to eat. Today was his day off and sadly he had a game so he couldn't come but somehow we still got time together.
My parents offered to drive him to his aunts house. When I was speaking with him we were holding hands but I was like playing with his fingers.

And I'm pretty sure some people saw but no one is going to mention it. Whatever he gets in the car and we start driving. In the car he held my hand. But he's always held my hand with our fingers intertwined. Then we stopped to get food before dropping him off.

It was him and I and my mom. When we get out I went and grabbed his hand and I felt him pull my hands close to him. So I was standing and walking closer to him. We let go as we go inside. We get in and we're just talking about random things when he suddenly asked me this; have you ever liked someone and wanted to be with them but still weren't over you're wanting to have fun phase.

I didn't ask if he was talking about us but it felt like he was. And I told him yeah. I told him that it's like me; I want to be with you but I'm scared of that commitment. In reality I'm scared if it'll even be worth it honestly. Then I showed him my nude picture.

It's just a picture of my butt. I was so scared but I was happy with the response. Anyways we got in the car again and he called me mami. When we dropped him off he said that he loved all of us. But then he said I love you to me twice. And I said it back but kept blushing cause my parents were in the car.

This is good. We're good. I'm good. It's gonna be good.