memories, psych [ 1 ]

027. lying gusters

"Are you prepared for your psychic seminar?" Gus asks Shawn.

"Gus, please." Shawn says as Shockley and Goddard walk up to them.

"Any leads? I'm adapting this into a Nancy Drew fanfic." Goddard says.

"I believe whoever's involved is in the vicinity." Shawn says.

"We made notes for you. Bullet points you might wanna try to hit." Shockley says, handing index cards to Shawn who gives them to Gus. "Don't show any fear."

"Don't split into infinitives." Goddard says.

"Don't dangle your participles." Shockley says.

"At least not in public." Gus says, going through the cards.

"Look, if I understood what you guys were saying, I'd still be a virgin." Shawn says.

"Ha. Good one." Vanessa laughs, high fiving her friend.

"Thank you." He tells her before turning to the teens. "Now, run along. Go to class."

The two leave.

"Really?" Gus asks, throwing the cards away.

~ ~ ~

They're in the lecture hall and Shawn writes on the chalkboard while Gus moves the podium up. Hahn walks into the room and stands in the back of the classroom.

"Hahn is here." Vanessa quietly informs, standing next to Shawn.

"The seminar's open to both students and teachers, guys. I personally extended Hahn an invitation so I can grill him in front of a live studio audience. If he's killed before, I'll get him to confess." Shawn says.

"How're you gonna interrogate someone and teach a class at the same time?" Gus whispers.

"First the carrot, then the stick." Shawn says. He turns to face the students.

"You don't even know what that means, do you?" Gus asks.

"Leave me alone." Shawn says.

Gus sits at the desk to the side and Vanessa sits on the desk.

""Phsycics."" Shawn underlines the word he wrote on the board. "The physics of psychics. I'm Professor Shawn Spencer. I will be your psychic ferryman over the River Styx. That's Gus and Vanessa. My ferry."

"Hello." Gus greets and Vanessa gives a two finger salute to the class.

"Each one of us is born with a kernel of what I like to dub "paranormalevolance." I, however, was born with an extra normal amount. Two cobs to be exact. Allow me to demonstrate. Congratulations on getting your braces removed." He tells a guy.

"That doesn't mean you're psychic. Maybe you're just hyper-observant." The kid says.

"You wear that white sweatshirt every day. Shall I tell the class why?" Shawn asks the kid lowers his head. "You." Shawn points to a student. "You, young man. A little aloe will do wonders for that combination skin. And perhaps you should use more care while shaving, or just wait until you can grow facial hair altogether."

"You could've just smelled my aftershave on the way in. How 'bout a real test? I'll write the answer on the board." The guy says.

"And I'll tell you the question. Have at it, young Trebek." Shawn says and the student walks to the board. "Trebek, I said." He says to his friends.

"This is Jeopardy!" Gus says.

"Potent potables!" Shawn says.

"Questions that start with P!" Vanessa says.