Found

Good People

Alex POV

It was about noon. Tobin and I sat on the couch in a comfortable silence. It was December 21st. I looked over at Tobin. She seemed so content. Like everything was perfect.
"I had a dream last night." I said.
"Oh really? What about?" She asked.
"Well, it was me and you, in the little yellow house, with white shudders and a white door. We had a nice lawn and a picket fence. There were flowers down by the gate and the sun was shining. And there was this little boy running around our yard. And he ran up to you and kept asking you to play with him. And we were sat on our brick steps, holding hands, and you kept telling him you'd come in a minute." I snuggled closer to her.
"And he kept asking you, and then one time you said ok. So you jumped up and picked him up and started running around the yard with him over your head. And he was laughing and yelling to me, 'Look mommy! Look!' And I laughed and looked at the two of you, and I couldn't stop smiling." I saw a small smile creep across her face.
"Tobin?" I asked. She looked at me.
"Do you wanna have kids?" I said. She hesitated a second.
"Alex, I mean, we're still like 20 years old, that's just a little bit older than my mom...Cindy was when she had me. And I-"
"You're not your mother Tobin." I said firmly. That seemed to calm her down a bit.
"I know. I know. But, I've seen how dangerous it could be. Kids are hard Lex. Do you want kids?" She asked. I nodded my head.
"And I want you to be there mother." I whispered. She nodded her head.
"I don't know. I'm not saying yes, I'm not saying no. I'm not saying never, but definitely not now." She said.
"No Tobin, I know. I don't want kids right now either." She nodded her head.
"I just, I don't know." She said. I nodded.
"Well, after that conversation, I say we do something fun." I said. I stood up and took her hand. She laughed stood up.
"What should we do?" I asked. I saw the light go on in her mind.
"I've got an idea," she said, "but bundle up." She smiled. I walked to her room and grabbed my puffy winter jacket, scarf, and mittens. I saw her putting something in the trunk of the car. She came in and grabbed a black, wool, coat that reached her mid thighs, stuffed some some leather gloves in her pockets, and grabbed a beanie.
"So when you say bundle up, you don't mean for you?" I laughed.
"I don't get cold." She said with a smile. We headed out to the car. We drove for maybe 20 minutes, humming Christmas songs that were on the radio.
"We're going to target?" I asked, recognizing the building.
"Not exactly." She said. She drove through the parking lot and out an exit I'd never noticed before. It took us through a few more lots before we were on this road with no other cars. She drove for a minute, and then, I saw it. It was huge. It was a giant...hill. It must've been at least 30 feet tall. It was covered in snow and there were trees at the top. Scattered all over the hill though, were people. They looked like ants from this far away. They were moving so fast and at first I couldn't figure out why. But then, I got it. They were sledding. I noticed Tobin wasn't in the car so I got out. Before I could get far she was at my side with a blue sled, an orange saucer and a snow board.
"What is happening?" I asked with a laugh.
"We, are gunna have fun." She said. We started walking to the hill and up a path. We got to the top and Tobin put the sled on the hill.
"Cmon." She said. She could tell I was a little scared.
"Here, you sit in the front, and I'll sit in the back to keep you safe." She said. She had me sit down and she followed me.
"Alright, I'm gunna let go of the breaks, ready?" She said.
"Actually I-" I couldn't finish because she let them go and we went flying. I started screaming with terror, while her screams were that of joy.
"TOBIN!" I yelled. We got faster and faster as we went down the hill. I heard her laughing behind me, which made me laugh. Then I saw a bump in the hill. I tried to warn Tobin but we hit it head on. The entire sled went airborne as we sailed through the sky. We hit the ground with a thud and we both tumbled off the sled. I rolled over on my back and heard Tobin laughing uncontrollably. I sat up and started laughing too. I looked at the pure joy on her face.
"I love you." I said to her. She looked at me for a second longer.
"Alex Morgan, I can't even begin to describe, how in love with you I am." She said as she made her way closer to me. She leaned in and kissed me. I felt her smile against my lips. I pulled back and rested my head in her shoulder.
"So, are you gunna try that death trap you call a snow board?" I asked.
"Hell yeah." She jumped up and ran up the path. I saw her strap her feet to the board and start scooting to the edge of the hill. This made me nervous. She gave me a thumbs up and I returned an unconvincing one. She jumped one last time and she was off. She started swearing back and forth on the hill. She was doing good, until she rode into some sticks that tangled her board and sent her flying forward. She rolled a couple times before lying in her back and laughing again.
"Can anything kill your mood?" I asked with a smile.
"Not when you're here." She stood up and took my hands. We walked back up the hill and kept sledding for a few more hours. Eventually we got so tired we decided to go home. We walked through the door and I immediately flopped on the couch.
"Same." Tobin said when she walked in and saw me.
"Oh babe, I wanna talk to you." I said sitting up.
"Haven't we had enough heavy talks today?" She smiled. She sat down next to me.
"I want you to talk to Cindy." I said.
"No, I want no part of her Alex, I don't need her I don't-"
"But maybe she needs you." I cut her off.
"I know what she did was stupid and horrible, but people can change Tobin."
"Not people like her, she fucked me over Alex. I was a kid, and I was by myself. People don't change."
"You did." She froze.
"Do you remember what you were like when we first met?" I asked.
"The same." She crossed her arms.
"No, no. You were colder. You were meaner. You were always angry at something. And I get that that came from Cindy, but now look at you. You're warmer, you're, a liiiitle bit nicer, and you're loving." I whispered and smiled at her.
"I don't wanna talk to her Alex."
"Just hear her out Tobs. I know that there isn't an excuse, but, maybe you just wanna see what's on her mind?" I asked. She thought for a few minutes before muttering a "fine."
I drove us to the studio where we said we'd meet Cindy. We asked where she was and followed the directions to the room she's be in. We walked in to find her sat at a table, slowly but surely, we made our way over to the seats.
"Tobin." Cindy greeted. Tobin just nodded her head. I nudged her with my elbow a bit.
"Hi." She said.
"Tobin, I wanted to tell you a little bit about what happened when you were younger." She scoffed a bit but Cindy kept going.
"I was still a kid when you came along. I didn't know what to do. Alcohol was my only friend then. But it poisoned me. It made me say and do some mean things to you and your father." Tobin shifted uncomfortably at the mention of her dad.
"I was under a lot of pressure. My mother was disappointed in me having a child that young, and I didn't know how to cope with it. I didn't know how to be a mother to you."
"You could've started by being there." Tobin interjected. It was harsh, but Cindy powered through.
"I'm not sure if you knew, but, I had been seeing other men during my marriage, and one night, I went to go see one of them. Surprise, I had been drinking, and he convinced me to get in his car so we could run away together. It seemed like a good idea. So I did it and we drove across the country. This was all when your father told me about the divorce. I was so mad and-"
"When did you find out about him?" Tobin asked.
"Hm?" Cindy asked.
"When did you find out he was dead." Tobin's words were harsh. I could tell she was trying to guilt Cindy, but saying it made her sad.
"Sometime in November." She said quietly.
"So, about six months after?" Tobin scoffed. Cindy just bowed her head.
"Tobin I-"
"Did you ever really know him?" She said. Cindy didn't speak.
"Did you ever see how he used to read to me? How he'd try to tell me everything would be alright, even though I could hear the uncertainty in his voice? Did you ever see how he'd attempt to make me dinner at midnight after you'd given me a plate of bread and cheese? How he'd try and make me feel better after one of your fits that led to go walking out? All he wanted was for me to be happy, but you took that from both of us." I held her hand trying to calm her a bit.
"I'm sorry, Tobin. I know it was a huge mistake."
"A mistake that fucked up my life. Listen, I get it, no one understands being a screw up as much as I do, but I didn't even have a chance. From the second I was born, that decision was made for me. I didn't get the luxury of choosing."
"I know Tobin."
"Oh and how's the new hubby? As good as dad was? Man did you even fucking know him? You couldn't find a better man than my father. Tell me honestly, when you found out he was gone did you get engaged to your husband the same hour, or did you wait a week out of respect for the dead? Let me tell you something, that day, I died too." By now Tobin was standing.
"I'm done." She said. She walked out and I ran after her.
"Tobin!" I saw her running down a hall so I followed her. I chased her to the parking lot calling her name the whole time. We got to her car and she stopped in front of it. I walked towards her.
"Tobin..." She slowly turned around, tears lining her cheeks.
"Baby..." I wrapped her in my arms and we sat on the curb. She cried and cried. I rubbed her back and stroked her hair, whispering in her ear.
"Why'd he have to leave Lex?" She asked when her tears had subsided.
"I don't know baby, I don't know."
"Why do horrible things happen to people who only wanna do good?"
I kissed the top of her head, "Because good people are the only ones who can handle it."