Shades Of Styles

16 and pregnant

They warn you about this in health class. The dangers of having sex. They preach to you that having sex at a young age could lead to this. They tell you to be safe, use a condom or get on birth control. Yet you never think you'll end up here. You shrug it off, thinking that you're the lucky one...but you're not.

And then you end up like me, 16 years old, in the bathroom of your house-your parents house because obviously you're too young to move out on your own. Too young to buy a house, buy alcohol or even see an R-rated movie alone. And you're staring down a stick that you've just peed as it determines the next 18 years of your life.

The plus size is prominent on the little screen and I can feel my stomach do a million flips. I feel like I'm going to vomit, which wouldn't be surprising. That's the whole reason I bought the test. I was puking almost everyday for a week straight. I didn't want to believe this was the reason so I ignored the signs. And then I missed my period and I knew that there was no more pretending.

What am I supposed to do? I'm only 16, I'm barely a junior in high school. I haven't even taken my drivers test yet, how will I take care of a whole baby?
As for the baby's father-I've only been dating him for 7 months. How will I tell him that I'm pregnant with his baby, how will I tell him that I want to keep it.
I mean, I guess I never really thought about my other options-at least I haven't yet. Maybe Harry will help me decide that before I even have to tell my parents.

After another few minutes of staring at the test, I shove back in its wrapper and put it in my purse. I'll just text Harry and tell him to meet me somewhere so we can talk. I'm already feeling enough anxiety over being pregnant but now that I have to tell Harry, the feeling has boosted a million times over.

A send a quick text to Harry explaining that I need to talk to him in person as soon as possible but it can't be at my house. It takes him about 5 minutes to send me a response saying we can meet at a park next to his house.

After I'm ready, I go downstairs to ask my mom for a ride to the park.

"Hey, mom-can I have a ride somewhere?" I ask as gently as possible, gripping my purse thats across my chest.

"Where?" She asks from her place at the kitchen table.

"The park by Harry's." I admit. My mom has never had a problem with Harry. They've only met once, at dinner a couple months ago. Harry and I agreed we were committed enough to meet each other's parents. I invited him to dinner and he made a good impression, in my opinion. My mom hasn't really asked much about him since then but I really haven't brought him up. Unless I've asked for a ride to his house. Even then, she just asks for the address and tells me what time I need to be home. That's all about to change soon.
I gulp down the bile in the back of my throat at the thought of telling my mom about my situation. She's always been proud of me and now she'll be disappointed in me for sure.

"Sure. Let me get my shoes on. How long will you be there?"

"A few hours." I shrug and she nods. "Mom-do you like Harry?" I ask without thinking. I need to know how she feels about him now, before I tell her. At least if she likes him now, they'll be some leverage.

"Well honey, I've only met him once. He seemed like a nice boy."

"I wasn't sure if you wanted to meet him again." I admit as she slides her shoes on and grabs her keys.

"I never wanted to force you to bring him here. Of course I wouldn't mind seeing him again. Why don't you have him come to dinner tonight." She offers. My heart drops for a moment at the thought of Harry being here after he finds out about me being pregnant. Will I have to tell her tonight then?

"Uh, maybe." I gulp. She just nods and I follow her out the door.

When we get to the park, I get out of the car and walk closer to the park. Harry is already here, sitting at the park benches. When he sees me, he smiles and stands up, ready to greet me with a hug.

"Hey beautiful," he beams as he pulls me in to his embrace. I soak up the feeling of him against me before he pulls away. "What did you want to tell me?" He questions as we sit down.

I take in a deep breath and look in his eyes, trying to calm myself before I tell him.

"How do you feel about us?" I first ask. His eyes furrow into confusion before he answers.

"I love you-I mean I love us. Is something wrong?" He asks as he grabs my hands.

"No. No....I love you too Harry. A lot." I sigh. I close my eyes and try to process what I will say. After a moment I convince myself to just spit it out.
"I'm pregnant." It comes out super fast and I don't even know I said it clearly enough until I open my eyes and see Harry's eyes are wide.

"Seriously?" He questions as he pulls his hands back to his lap. I just nod and pull the pregnancy test out of my purse. I show it to him and his shoulders slump.

"How-how do you feel?"

"I uh...I don't know what to say. I...I used protection-I thought." He stammers, not looking at me. I put the pregnancy test back in my purse and look at him.

"What do you want to do?" I ask him, ignoring his comment. Sometimes it doesn't always work, we both know that.

"What do you want to do?" He repeats my question back to me.

"I was kind of hoping you'd tell me." I push him.

"You're the one who's pregnant. It has to be your decision."

"It's your baby too Harry." I remind him.

"Did you tell your parents yet?"

"No. I was waiting to see what we were going to do. You know, in case we decided not to go further, we wouldn't have to even tell them." I explain. He looks from me to the playground across from us and then back to me.

"I don't know (Y/N)...maybe we should keep it. Wouldn't it be the right thing to do?"

"I mean, I guess so. We're so young though."

"I'm going to be 18 next year, I have to be more adult about this. We should keep it." He offers. So there it is. I knew deep down this is what I wanted and to hear him say the same, makes me feel a little better. I can't believe it, we're going to be parents.