Shades Of Styles

He breaks up with you part 2

2 months later

I'm sitting at the park laughing with my friends Eleanor, Zoe and Marc. Marc just made a really funny joke about bananas and I couldn't help but burst into hysterical laughter at it. I haven't laughed this much in months. It almost made me forget about the pain in my chest about Harry but as soon as I stop laughing it rises more and I frown at the thought of losing Harry. I told him I don't know if I could ever get back together with him for leaving me the way he did. I let my anger get the best of me which landed me in the hospital.

Sometimes when I'm sitting at home late in my room, he will creep into my mind and I'll think about answering the 20 calls daily or replying to the millions of text from Harry. I'm surprised I have ignored him for so long but every text message made me hate myself more for trying to erase Harry from my life. But then I would go into the bathroom and look at the scare on my cheek and remember why he isn't in my life any more. But even that can't mask the pain growing in my chest each and every day.

"(Y/N) did you hear us?" Eleanor asks.

"Oh, no. Sorry" I apologize and look up at her.

"Were gonna call it a day. Is that okay?"

"Yeah, I need a nap anyways" I say truthfully. I need to sleep away all my stress. I climb off my seat and make my way to my car. I start the engine and drive off.

The drive is slow and painful being stuck in my own head is torture. Every time I try to block him out, he comes back. And its not helping with him calling every 5 minutes.

I pull up to my drive way and see something on my steps. I turn off my car and go up to the door. Its Harry...of course. What thats the 4th time this weekend I think.

"Harry, get up" I tell him.

"Sorry, I was worried about you. You weren't answering my calls"

"I never answer your calls" I inform him

"And Im always worried about you" he smiles lightly.

"Harry you have to stop doing this. Every day is a routine with you. I don't want to get back together with you, how many times do I have to say it."

"Until...i can have you again."

"Thats a bit of a contradiction don't you think?"

"I don't care. Whatever it takes."

"It takes nothing to leave me alone and move on...I mean wouldn't that be a lot easier?"

"No because then you wouldn't be in my life anymore"

"What if I don't want to be in it anymore?"

"You don't mean that...if you didn't want to be, you would have called the cops on me a long time ago"

"Lets get something straight" I step closer to him. "I could have the cops here a long time ago if that's what I wanted but I care about you to much. But if you want me too, I have my phone right here" I hold it up for him to see.

"No, can we at least talk it out. Let me explain everything to you and then if you still don't want to be with I will leave you alone"

"I don't know Harry I-"

"Please" he pleads.

"Alright, fine" I shrug and unlock my door. "Come in I guess" I invite him in. If this is what he wants then I guess Ill humor him. If this is the only way to get him to leave me alone and let me mourn over him in peace then I guess I will have to let him down easy.

"Why don't you just give him a second chance. He deserves it." my subconscious buts in but I ignore her. It's not about giving him a second chance, I love Harry and care about him to much but this is about respecting myself and not going straight back where I started cause I know how safe it is there.

"(Y/N), listen. I love you and I'm sorry-" he starts but I put my hand up to stop it.
"Save it. I heard it all before. You're sorry, you love me. You'll never do it again, blah blah. If your going to sit her and spat that crap to me then you can leave"
"What do you want me to say?" he asks.
"What do you want to say. No generic shit. I'm tired of it" I say trying to keep my anger out of the tone of my voice. I'm surprised I have kept it up this long, I thought I would be putty in his hands eventually but I'm glad I'm keeping a strong hold on my dignity.
"Okay, give me a second" he looks down and I sigh. "(Y/N)" he starts and I sit waiting for the same shit. "I don't know what to say...so I'm just going to talk until something good comes out of it." he pauses for a long period of time and I sit back in my seat. This outta be good. "What happend 2 months ago, that was-I don't know. I have no idea why I was being a dick to you, heat of the moment I guess. I was just so angry at everything. I was pissed, and fuming. As soon as the words left my mouth I knew I fucked up but I couldn't stop myself. At the time I wanted you to feel upset, you weren't crying like normally when we fight so I wanted you to. I knew saying that shit would push you over the edge. And I know what you said but I am so terribly sorry for that. When Eleanor called me and said you were in the hospital and I stopped for a moment. I dropped what I was doing and came straight over. She was yelling at me, calling me a worthless piece of shit and thats what I am. She said it was all my fault and it was. And after you sent me away I spent weeks crying and breaking shit over it. I got drunk night after night. But I realized that wouldn't bring you back to me. So I devoted everything I did to getting you back. I went nights not sleeping because I couldn't and I wouldn't allow myself a break. I wouldn't allow myself food, not until I had you back-"
"Wait, so your saying you haven't eaten or slept in weeks?" I ask.
"Yeah, I guess so but after a while the hunger pains went away and so did the exhaustion" he shrugs. Now that I look at him, he looks skinner, less muscular and there are bags under his eyes along with black lining. This is not what I wanted. I wanted him to realize he fucked up really bad and that it would take a lot more then a few apologies to get me back. I didn't-I don't want him not sleeping or eating.
"Anyways, I just really need you in my life. Please. (Y/N), if you allow me to be with you then I can show you how I can be a good guy. I will treat you like my queen, anything you want-its yours. The truth is, I gave you my heart and you kept it. Locked it away and I know you don't plan on giving it back and I don't want it but you shoved me away you stole your heart back and left with me none." I know thats cheesy but I can't sit here any longer looking at his skeleton of a body.
"Please (Y/N). Please
"Okay" I say without hesitation and push myself on to him hugging him. "Please just eat for me and sleep." I kiss his cheek.
"Really?"
"Yes please" I beg.
"O-okay. I love you so much" he wraps his arms around me tightly.