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TW mention of ED, talks of ED.
Another visit to Hogsmeade, and this time, Josephine has no particular needs. The speed at which this year is progressing feels peculiar; mid-November has arrived in the blink of an eye. December is looming, marking almost a year since she departed from Euphemia and Fleamonts.
Despite understanding that leaving was the right decision, there are moments when Josie finds herself missing the small comfort she had there.
Regulus, walking alongside her on the way to Hogsmeade, notices her contemplative demeanor. The crunch of snow beneath their shoes accompanies his concerned inquiry, "You alright?"
Tightening her jacket around herself, Josephine replies, "I'm fine," while absentmindedly twisting a bracelet on her wrist.
"Are you sure? Is something–"
"I'm fine," she cuts him off, offering a fake smile, then moves to walk beside Evan, leaving Regulus behind.
Reflecting on her abrupt behavior, she can't help but think, that was rude. Why did she do that? Merlin, she is a bitch.
Evan, seemingly unfazed, extends an open bag of snacks to her. Politely declining, she observes as he nonchalantly takes a snack for himself.
Perhaps her unexpected rudeness stems from a wave of self-loathing that envelops her before sleep the night before. Skipping meals isn't uncommon, but the added burden of comparing herself to every passing girl intensifies the struggle.
Picking at her nails, she steals a glance back at Regulus, who is engaged in conversation with Pandora. Returning her focus to her nails, they reach the village.
Josie manages to break away from the group effortlessly, lamenting the abrupt shift from laughter to desolation. The recent snow fight had momentarily filled the void within her, but now she feels blank, sad, and detached.
The desire to send a letter to her parents, Serena and Aspen, lingers in her thoughts. She craves a response, hoping to bridge the emotional gap that currently consumes her.
Curious about the comforting gestures Serena and Aspen might offer, Josephine wonders if Serena would gently brushes her hair while murmuring soothing words, or if Aspen would read her a comforting story.
The abrupt transition from happiness to despondency feels like a sudden switch has been flipped, jolting her back to the harsh reality. The impending discovery of another Horcrux and the likelihood of facing death during the search oddly doesn't disturb her much. It strikes her as peculiar how accepting she feels about the prospect of dying.
Contemplating mortality, Josie acknowledges that she deliberately ignores thoughts that would have previously upset her. It seems like her karma is catching up, choosing to exacerbate her sadness and depression.
