A Monologue Lovingly Ripped Off From the "Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch" Monologue From Monty Python and the Holy Grail
And she did raise upon high the Holy Soccer Ball of Antioch saying "bless this, O Lord, that with it thou mayest shoot every shot into the goal in thy mercy." and the American Outlaws did rejoice and paint their faces and their stomachs and their chests... the Lord did speak, saying "first, thou settest the Holy Soccer Ball on 'the spot.' then thou must back up and count to three. Three shall be the number of the counting, and the number of the counting shall be three. To four shalt thou not count, nor shalt thou count to two, excepting that thou then proceedeth to three. Five is right out! When three, being the number of the counting, be reached, thou raiseth thy hand and kick the Holy Soccer Ball in the direction of the goalie, who, being naughty in my sights, shall fail to save it.
Glad you read this? No? Me neither. I'm having writer's block, guys. I need requests.
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USWNT Oneshots
FanfictionA variety of oneshots involving the US Women's National Soccer Team. Ranges from funny to romantic-ish to feelz.
