Can't hate you || e.d

Gunshot

Y/n

During the next days things were a little bit different... he was colder.. he was working more.. and less at home.. whenever he saw me he only kissed my forehead and kept working. I could understand that. He was really busy and I knew what a complicated person he was so I gave him some time hoping he wasn't mad at me or something.

I was sitting in the backyard again -as usual because it was my favorite spot- watching a movie on my laptop. It was a funny movie but I couldn't laugh without him. I was only thinking about him instead of paying attention... if he was annoyed.. overworking himself.. or anything else..

I was totally addicted to him. The tiniest thought of him made me smile and I realized that I got used to him way too fast..

Suddenly I heard his voice and stood up immediately. I ran to the entrance as fast as I could. He was standing on the front door and as he saw me coming he smiled. I hugged him really tightly. He left an hour ago and I didn't expect him to be back so quickly so I was really happy.
"I... forgot something.. I need to go back.." he said, crashing all my dreams and my happiness. I was very sad so I backed off slowly. "It's okay.." I said trying to smile.

Ethan

I had a lot of things to do with the boys. We needed to plan every single thing and collect every single detail to kill these hoes. This was almost making me almost crazy. I had to be cold. It hurt. She was my babygirl... the distance was hurting more than I thought. Three days were left to her birthday and I had a lots of surprises for her but first I needed to clear this all because otherwise I wouldn't be able to concentrate on her..

I needed some stuff and a few clothes for the mission from the city where Josh was already waiting for me. I needed to go back but I didn't want to.. I wanted to stay with her... I could see how sad she was. She looked at the ground but I lifted her chin with my fingers and made her look at me..

"Babygirl. Don't be sad.. you can help me." she tried to smile. I didn't want her to feel locked into this mansion like she would be in prison.

I interlocked her hand with mine and walked upstairs with her. She sat down on my bed and watched me checking my clothes and getting some credit cards. She didn't say a word.. Josh told me that I should take her with me wherever I go but it wasn't possible.. our home was the safest place but I knew she was getting moody in here..

I looked at her and she was still really quiet.

"Hey.. you know I'm not the type of boyfriend who's always kind and tells you how beautiful you are and how much I love you but.."
She sighed. "But..?"

I smiled and walked towards her. "You're beautiful and I love you.."

I could see that smile on her face.. and this time it was honest.. that smiled showed me every time.. that no matter what I would do or how bad I would mess up.. that she would always have my back and love me no matter what a stubborn jerk I would be. That she really loved me and cared.

She stood up. I approached her and put the hair which fell into her face behind her ear.

"I need to get some things from the city. But I'll be right back.." she hugged me. "I'm missing you.."

That hurt. Because I couldn't tell her about anything... I didn't wanted her to be sad or worry. Scaring her would be unnecessary to this point. I was going to handle that without telling her anything.. "Do you want to come with me?" I asked her and her eyes lit up...

Y/n

We were driving down to the city. I was looking out of the window as he grabbed my hand and kissed it. I smiled at him. We didn't talk a word until we arrived. It seemed like we both were strained and I couldn't tell why.. He turned the engine off and said "Just wait here okay? I promise I'll be back in ten minutes." I leaned back and nodded smiling. It was okay that I couldn't follow him with every step. Being there was already enough.. He got off the car and I knew exactly that he was planning a new mission.