Can't hate you || e.d

Dark Moon

Dean

I went to the restroom to wash my face because my nose was bleeding. Actually not only my nose. His blood was also on my cheeks and my temple but he didn't hurt me. No one was able to hurt me.. only my dad. I couldn't feel any pain because I was already used to it.. thank him. He Mädels get used to it and the pain that he was giving was the only thing that could hurt me.. but Moon's moves.. we're nothing against that. Actually I should thank dad for that one day.

I looked at myself in the mirror and got mad at myself.. I leaned onto the sink with my hands and looked deep into my own eyes.. I started breathing faster and heavier... I should've hurt him more. I should've said things that would have made him really kill me. I should've said things that would've made him lose his mind.. but I was going to do it.. I still had time. I was going to make him so angry that he was literally going to explode. I was going to be the most disgusting person on this planet.. the biggest douchebag.. until he would kill me because all I wanted was death.. that's all I deserved.

I hated everything. I wanted other people to be as hurt as me. Why should I be the only one who was hurt and angry? Why should I be the only one who was lonely and in pain? That was unfair. But I was going to handle it because I was going to make Moon crazy, break Sun's heart, kill my dad, kill Blake and myself at the end.

That was my biggest wish. Dying one day.. hopefully on my eighteenth birthday.. I knew that people who turned eighteen felt free.. and I was going to feel free as well.. only a little differently than them. There wasn't much left to my birthday. Only a few months.. and then I was going to be free as well..

That's what happened when I looked at myself in the mirror.. I hated myself even more than before..

I was never going to be happy. So I just needed to keep being savage so no one would get close to me and get something of my negativity. I was like a dark cloud that destroyed everything and everyone.. and I wasn't going to let someone come near me because I didn't want them to turn grey too. I wanted to be lonely.. I needed to keep being who I was. No feelings. For no one. Never.

I walked out after washing and drying my face. I fixed my hair before and went straight to class. I was planning to sleep during the next period but when I sat down I got a few snaps from Sun that made it impossible for me to sleep.. they woke me up.. completely. I almost dropped my phone.

She sent me pictures of her.. pictures that made me go crazy.. I've got endless nudes from endless stupid girls but none of them hit me like these.. none of them made me feel like these made me feel.. and she wasn't even naked. This girl was really different.. I was surprised because I never thought I would get her to do that and I didn't even ask her. I liked that... it was a huge step... just like I wanted it. I took screenshots of each of them.

Just when I wanted to text back she sent me more.. I felt like I couldn't breathe.. she was so god damn hot and pretty.. I swallowed and tried to keep calm. The smirk on my lips got bigger and bigger... Especially because I knew I was the only one who was going to see her like this. I was the only one she was sending these to.. and I was going to keep them to myself..

'Do you like it, daddy?'

I bit my lower lip and tried to breathe like a normal human being. She couldn't do this to me while I was in public.. she couldn't do this to me while she wasn't next to me.. she couldn't kill me like this.. If she would've only know how much I liked it...

'You already made me horny this morning. But now.. I need you..'

I imagined everything that I wanted to do to her. She really made my thoughts run wild..

She texted back.

'Goal 👼🏼'

That made me laugh. I needed to see her and I knew she needed to see me as well.